Over the last three seasons, there are few times that I can remember where I was and what I was doing the first time I read an episode of Friday Night Lights. The ones I can remember are somewhat random: Episode 104, "Who’s your Daddy," August 7, 2006 (these dates are approximate so don’t get all "Smoking Gun" on me). I was sitting in my car, outside a coffee shop in Austin and blasting my AC as I battled a 100-plus degree wave (welcome to Texas). Episode 201: "Last Days of Summer," July 16, 2007. I was lounging in my hotel room at the Beverly Hilton in L.A. (trying to resist the mini bar), and getting ready for NBC’s TCA convention later that evening.
But I’ll never forget where I was when I read episode 304, "Hello, Goodbye." August 5th 2008. I remember coming home after getting some grub on another record hot day, which by now I had actually gotten used to. As I came up the stairs, I saw a package on my doorstep watching me, waiting for me…though I had also been waiting on it.
It was pretty easy to fall back into the rhythm of filming the show. I quickly reacquainted myself with the sights and sounds of Austin/Dillion and our outstanding cast and crew…but it was all of course all bittersweet. For as early as July, the announcement had been made that "the Smash" would only be around for a limited engagement. So from the beginning of season 3, there was always a lovingly sentimental vibe that trailed me on set.
Now the only question was, how would it occur? Jason Katims, our brilliant head writer, had given me some bullet points as to the overall arc of the four episodes, but he was keeping the details air tight. Now here’s a little TV production "inside baseball." The crew of the show always gets a production draft of any given script ahead of the actors. And if you got a friend on the other side of the line, they’ll keep you informed in the gap as to what’s coming down the pipe. We had already started shooting episodes 1 and 2 of the new season and my sources were telling me I should be getting episode 3 any day.
As I picked up the package in my doorstep that night, I found thatnot only did I get episode 3, but I also got the long awaited, muchanticipated episode 4 — the final chapter in Brian’s saga. I rememberliterally sitting on the edge of my seat reading those episodes intothe wee hours of the night. I flew through episode 3, but when I pickedup 4 I remember pausing for a moment — wondering if I should read it nowor save it for the morning. I decided to go ahead and push the plunger,reading each page on that episode unusually carefully. I was like a kidreading his favorite bedtime story to himself for the first time — whoinstinctively knew the plot and characters but savoring each letter onthe page. And then I saw the last words of the script "Goodbye SmashWilliams." I stared at those words for a long time, and then all Icould whisper was "Amen."
As the next few weeks played out, I was hit with some genuineflashbacks from high school. Did you ever mull over that corny subtextat the end of a school year or just before graduation? "This is thelast time I’m gonna use my locker." "This is the last time I’m gonnaeat lunch in the cafeteria." "This is the last time I’m gonna see myfriends together." Well, those moments started to take their place, butfor most part there was no sign of sappiness.
Shooting the last scene at the Williams’ house stands out in mymind. I remember laughing it up with my TV family — Corrina Williams(played by the incomparable Liz Mikel, a legend to the fans) and mytwo sisters (Brittany "Nieko" Mann and Whitney McCauley) — as we recappedall the anecdotes and bloopers that took place while bringing ourfamily’s journey to life.
In fact, it really didn’t hit me at all until I filmed my final scenewith Kyle Chandler. Of course, it didn’t hurt that we filmed it on myfinal day on set and it was the last setup of the night. I remembersitting in my trailer, trying figure out: What exactly should I play?How much should I play it? All that "actor stuff" that goes out thewindow when you realize life has given you everything needed to capturethe truth of those vulnerable moments.
Ever since the show premiered on Direct TV last year, I have tried tofind the words to sum up how I’ve felt about having the opportunity toportray Smash Williams. And now that it has premiered on NBC, I findmyself stumped once again. Blessed, honored, grateful, humbled, that’sa start. In fact, the only tough thing about having to say goodbye tothe show (at least as a regular) is having to say goodbye over and overagain, lol. But maybe that’s just a sign that my experience as Smashwill live on in the heart and minds of us all for a very, very longtime. So where was I when I ended my run as a series regular on FridayNight Lights? Only at the beginning….
Oh yeah, one more thing, "Clear Eyes. Full Hearts. CAN’T LOSE!!"
“Clear Eyes. Full Hearts. CAN’T LOSE!!”
Gaius thank you for sharing! I will miss you in the show but the show must go on .. no?
Smash Williams left Dillion with his name & head held high … I am sure Gaius Charles will do the same ;o)
Since season one of “Friday Night Lights,” I’ve always felt like Smash has never quite fit in with the rest of the characters. That statement is meant in no way as a slight to Gaius Charles, who has done a spectacular job throughout the series. Perhaps it was Smash’s pride-but whatever the reason, while I enjoyed Smash I never felt his character mesh with the ensemble.
But starting at the end of season two and especially this season, Smash became so much more engaged with the other characters. Perhaps it was the humbling of his injury, but it was just so enjoyable to see him spending time with Saracen or Landry. It gave more weight to his exit.
Charles did a smashing (no pun intended-well, maybe a little) job in these final episodes. The above essay was very insightful about his mindset as his storyline concluded. I’ll remember that final smile for a long time to come…it was a fantastic sendoff. Smash, and Charles, will be greatly missed–and I’m certain he has a bright future.
Smash Williams is the heat and soul of this season of FNL. I love every minute he’s on screen. Thank you Gaius for giving us some great television! We’ll miss Smash.
This was one of the best episodes of FNL (and that is saying a lot). I can’t help but be a little heartbroken that Smash is gone. I am so happy for him that he is able to accomplish his dreams and this was the perfect ending for his character. The scene with Coach Taylor and then the boys playing on the field…..perfect. Thank you to Gaius Charles and the outstanding writers of FNL for giving us one of the best characters. Smash will be missed.
Gaius, you are a class act… to the end. I have so enjoyed your portrayal of Smash Williams over these last 3 season. Starting off as the cocky invincible kid and ending as the humbled, grateful man in this last episode. Smash’s last scenes with coach and on the field with the guys and that big ole infectious smile of his will go down, for me, as one of the best moments in television history. Thank you, Gaius for your excellent portrayal and I know you have many successful years to come!
Gaius,
I think what makes some art great is its ability to, as the adage goes, ” make something more real than if it had actually happened.” The best art can captivate us and make us truly care about its outcomes. TV is the perfect medium for this, and “Friday Night Lights” is one of the most perfect television shows that I’ve ever seen and ever will see. I feel like I know these people better than most real people that I know. I care about them deeply, I worry about them, and I miss them when they are away. More than anything, I cheer at their triumphs. Seeing you in the episode last night- at the height of Brian’s evolution, off to start his incandescent future as you start your own- was a moment that made me cheer as hard as I was able. This show, this brilliant art, means a lot to me, and you were a part of that for a very long time. Thank you so much for that. Have an outstanding career. I’m rooting for you.
Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose.
Wow, that was beautiful. It’s nice to know that your goodbye meant as much to you as it did to us fans. Your acting over the past three seasons has been a joy to watch, especially alongside Liz Mikel (you’re right, she is a legend to us). Thank you for your tremendous work. “The Smash” will be sorely missed.
That episode was fantastic. I watched it on DirecTV when it first aired. I was sitting on my couch with a friend of mine, both of us guys, and we both started getting teary eyed at the same point. When Smash tells mom that he is in. Neither of us looked at each other, not wanting to lose guy points. Then my wife walked in, as if on cue, and said, “hey, is something wrong with your eyes?” “You look like you’re crying”
So thanks for a fantastic episode and a great performance. (my wife will never let me live down the night that I sat around having a good cry on the couch)
Gaius,
Watching the scene with Coach, I knew your tears were real — and that it must have been bittersweet to be leaving the Friday Night Lights experience that is so special and so unique.
You are great at what you do — an example to all in what you give to your role and in how you live your life.
Best wishes to you. May you receive all that you deserve as you move forward in your career.
I said it last week with Connie Britton’s blog, and I’ll say it again now: it is such a treat to get online and see a post written by one of FNL’s greats. Gaius, you were incredible in your run on FNL – the overall arc of your story is just great to behold. Last night, after bawling my eyes out from the scene with you & Coach at his house, I put in the Pilot to relive old memories. How far Smash has come!
I’ll never forget the episode when you stayed in the locker room and cried, just before the game. That one had me hooked on you from that moment on.
Clear eyes…
I love, love, love this show. There are none like it and Gaius Charles is one of the reasons why. I will miss “The Smash” and hope that they keep up with his family. Bravo Gaius Charles, Bravo!
Even though it was only in the show, it was great to see Smash come back from that knee injury. Very inspiring. It’s going to be hard to watch the rest of the season without Smash, but at least on the bright side, more time for Saracen & Julie! (love this show)
Watching this last night I felt like I was saying good-bye to a dear friend and cried my eyes out during the last 2 scenes and found myself welling up while reading this post. It just goes to show how much effect a good show can have on its fans. Thank you FNL for sending off a most beloved character in a classy and touching way.
Awesome blog, Gaius thank you for the brilliant portrayal of Brian “Smash” Williams, one of my all time favorite TV characters now!
FNL remains one of the best written, directed, edited and acted out shows on TV.
I sincerely hope NBC and DirectTV reach a deal for a 4th season!
Anyone who isn’t familiar with FNL, pick up the S1 DVD set, you will not be disappointed. You will want to get the S2 set and then get caught up with S3.
Again, it’s a show about life, relationships and small town americana…the “football” is just the vehicle used to tell the story (for most of the characters).
FNL – ALL HEART, and if you didn’t tear up during last night’s eppy…you maybe dead inside;)
Gaius, thank you so much for this blog. I have so enjoyed your character on what is my favorite show. Last night’s episode was amazing, and you and your character absolutely deserved such a perfect send-off. I look forward to seeing you in many other shows and/or movies in the future.