'American Psycho': The Musical

Americanpsycho_lGet ready for the biggest feel-good Broadway musical since Sweeney Todd: it’s the forthcoming stage version of American Psycho. Yes, according to Variety, someone really is making a musical out of Bret Easton Ellisnotorious novel about an ’80s Wall Street yuppie/serial killer. Ellis’ Patrick Bateman will soon be showing theatergoers his custom-crafted business cards and slashing his way into their hearts, perhaps to the show-stopping strains of Huey Lewis’ "Hip to Be Square." (The rights holders haven’t yet hired a librettist or a composer, but Lewis and Phil Collins probably aren’t too busy right now.) No word on whether the orchestra seats will be under plastic sheeting to protect theatergoers from the spatters, like at a Gallagher show.

What was it about Ellis’ 1991 novel, and the 2000 movie adapted from it, that suddenly sang, "Broadway musical!" to the producers? As one of them told Variety, "Now in particular it seems relevant, especially given what’s happening on Wall Street." That’s true, even if the current financial bloodbath is just a metaphorical one (so far). Still, if the fiscal meltdown continues, who’ll be able to afford to pay upwards of $100 a ticket to see a gruesome satire of the excesses of consumer capitalism?

It would be fun to see Christian Bale (pictured) reprise his movie role (and we know from Newsies he can sing and dance), but his dance card is a little full these days. Oh well, at least there’s no shortage of American Psycho Idol also-rans who could fill Patrick Bateman’s wingtips. (Michael Johns, this is your now!) Any additional suggestions for the producers on how to make Psycho a killer at the Tonys and at the box office are welcome in the comments section below.

addCredit(“Kerry Hayes”)


Comments (14 total) Add your comment
  • Agatha Crusty

    Cheyenne Jackson! Out of Xanadu but still superfine.

  • Winona

    Uhh… I think this is the (no pun intended) death knell for the let’s-turn-any-old-movie-into-a-Broadway-musical phase. Or at least I hope so. But who knows; it could end up being brilliant…

  • elena

    Alright! Newsies is a 2-hour classic, but Christian Bale does not have the best voice ever. Dance moves? Pretty intense. But voice? As much as I love him for Batman, there is no way I am letting him get off easy for singing in Newsies. Plus, I think he kind of regrets it, even though it’s funny to think of his movie career…

  • alexandra

    i love christian bale more than is considered healthy, but doing a musical on broadway? loved him in newsies, loved him in swing kids, but good lord, no. plus, i just can’t see “american psycho” as a broadway production. can’t writers come up with something original for the stage? enough with taking movies and turning them into broadway shows already!!!!

  • dale

    Yes please. Great idea. How about Brian d’Arcy once he closes SHREK the Musical. PLease get a good composer

  • Gina

    Agatha, I too thought of Cheyenne. :) He really would be perfect. But I also agree with Alexandra – enough already! We have to deal with all these other movie musicals lasting years beyond their stay while we sit and watch original, smart shows like Passing Strange and [title of show] get kicked off of Broadway. Why do I have to like great things and suffer through their early demises? Happens in television, and now Broadway… WHY?

  • Houstonian Jen in DC

    ::sigh:: First Spiderman on Broadway, and now this??? Are there seriously no good, original ideas for Broadway musicals that investors are willing to back and people would be willing to see?

  • Nix

    This is the moment!
    My final trade!
    Now that Merrill’s bought
    And Lehman’s bed is made…

  • Eric Friedmann

    It seems to me that over the last 10 years or so, Broadway productions have sunk to the level of constantly recycling previous material (just like Hollywood!) that was originally on the screen. LEGALLY BLONDE, YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN, SHREK, SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER, DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS…when the f*ck does it end? Even my favorite film comedy of all time, MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL, really sucked as SPAM-A-LOT on stage.
    There must be a reason I went to see AVENUE Q twice; it was one of the most original things I had seen on the stage in a long time. I’m absolutely finished seeing any more stage productions based on movies! A waste of my time and money!

  • PJ Finazzo

    EVIL DEAD was awesome as a musical, i hope this is just as good.

  • Kyle

    All of you complaining about wanting an “original” show: when was the last time an original show did any good at all? Sweeney Todd, Les Mis, Phantom of the Opera, Wicked, Into the Woods? EVERY one of them was based on previous books, movies and stories. And EVERY one of them is excellent. I think American Psycho, if handled properly, could easily join those ranks. To say that because it’s based on something else makes it bad is to say that almost nothing can be good.

  • DEEDEE

    My 2 sons, aspiring film makers, came up with the concept & script for
    “Psycho, the Musical” (based on the Hitchcock movie)when they were 12 and 10 years old. Tag line: Check in. Relax. Grab your tap shoes. I’d be happy to toss their names into the hat as librettists.

  • maria

    I hope they have a musical number called “don’t just stare at it, eat it.” And “I have to return some videotapes.”

  • luxury watch

    It’s good! rolex watch?
    luxury watch?

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