Aug 7 2008 05:59 PM ET

Help! 'Dancing With the Stars' needs a new casting director!

Dancingstars_lI just read InTouch’s latest gossip about possible casting choices for Dancing With the Stars‘ upcoming seventh season — an official announcement is supposed to be made August 25 on Good Morning America — and all I can say is "Waaah waaah waaahn." I stopped religiously watching DWTS midway through season 4, but seriously, doesn’t it seem like it’s time to break out of the former boy-bander/burly male athlete/all-grown-up teen-series alumnus/yadda yadda yadda doldrums? Alleged contenders for the Disco Ball Trophy include Toni Braxton, Kim Kardashian (ick!), Ty Murray, Dan Marino, Lance Bass and Florence Henderson, but I say j’enough!Here’s my (partial) dream lineup for Season 7:

Mo’Nique (pictured, top left): Let’s see Louis van Amstel try to boss around this lady!
Mischa Barton: Someone has to get voted out first.
Eartha Kitt (pictured, bottom right, and already favoring sequins): I recently saw the octogenarian’s live set at New York’s Café Carlyle, and eighty is officially the new forty.
Lita Ford: And just like that, leather shakes up the sequins vs. fringe rivalry.
Alexandre Despatie (pictured, top right): I googled "hot Olympians" and look who I came up with!
Macaulay Culkin: [Place hands on cheeks; scream.]
Andrew Shue (pictured, bottom left): Do something, Andrew!
Erik Estrada: Let’s see what the DWTS costume crew can do with a motorcycle-cop inspiration!

Who else should be on the DWTS season 7 lineup? Ready, set, cast!

Comments (1-30) of 36 Add your comment

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  • SarahP

    I don’t watch DWTS, so I can’t really help you, but this Canadian was just really excited to recognize one of our best athletes staring up at her from the screen. He’s probably too nice for DWTS though, don’t they usually like their contestants to be dramatic?

  • Jill

    Keeping it C-List, here are my picks…
    Guys:
    Darren Hayes…great 90’s flashback and it might awaken America to his tremendous talents as a solo act
    John Barrownman…he would be fantastic and his charisma is perfect for the show
    Ace Young…He didn’t get enough credit on his first reality show, perhaps DWTS with finally showcase him
    Robbie Williams…three words…charisma, charisma, charisma
    Robert Hoffman…sure he would blow away the competition but it would be fun to watch
    Girls:
    Jenna Jameson…she proves she has moves in the bedroom but what can she bring to the dancefloor
    Michelle Obama…I bet she has some great moves and we know she would have a great wardrobe…plus, extra press for Obama never hurt anyone but Old Man McCain
    Chelsea Handler…She might not be a great dancer but she would be funny
    Jordin Sparks…she seems like someone that would really grow in the competition and have fun with it
    Demi Lavato…If you gotta have a tween star, she’d be my pick

  • Dance Fan

    How bout Magic Johnson? We haven’t seen him in awhile. Love the Andrew Shue and Alex Despatie ideas.
    Brooke Shields would be interesting.
    I just saw Sebastian Bach is doing Gone Country 2: he or Bret Michaels would bring a whole new dimension…

  • Sally in Chicago

    I get the feeling DWTS producers are being turned down by those celebs they really want; like Dan Quail & Kathy Griffin. Perhaps they’ve seen the embarassment that Jerry Springer (examp.) went through. Toni Braxton is not a bad choice, but will her heart hold up? I Think DWTS is just about done. Just like you, I stopped watching last season, esp. since Max never won. It’s just another variety show with dancers.

  • rebecca

    Jill – John Barrowman is definitely NOT a C-lister in Britain. I love him, but he would be waaayyy to busy over there to come film an entire season of an American realizy show!
    How about Wil Whedon for the former-teen-actor category? The dude that played Wesley Crusher on Star Trek: The Next Generation. That would be kinda awesome.

  • Heather

    In the vein of Eartha Kitt – I vote for Charo.

  • Snarf

    Alexandre Despatie. Yum. And he can get away with wearing a black speedo (few men can)

  • Melinda65

    Please, no more TV time for the already over-exposed Kardashian clan. The rest of the list isn’t too bad, IMO.
    I think rebecca’s idea of Wil Wheaton would be great. I think that the show has been lacking in the “former sci-fi actor” demographic.

  • Ceballos

    I’ll put in my votes for Fred Savage and Stacy London of “What Not to Wear.”
    Also, I like the suggestion of Chelsea Handler. Or even better, it’d be even funnier if they cast her sidekick Chuey. I mean, why not? The show’s already had a deaf contenstant, a one-legged contestnat, several really big contestants, so why not a little person?

  • MsDaisy

    Well, since we’ve got Mrs Brady already, how about the Brady Kids? Throw in some Partridges and you’ve got the entire season booked.

  • Stephanie T.

    Robbie Williams, yum
    Charo
    Gloria Estefan
    Chad Lowe
    Joel McHale
    Mary Lou Rentton
    Wayne Cherbet
    Katarina Witt
    Beverley Johnson

  • marc

    Monique is genius, Michael. Just the kind of personality this show needs. She is funny as hell, has a great personality and I bet she can move. Plus it would be interesting to see someone who isn’t stick figure thin on this show. I think she would be a great contestant. Eartha Kitt is a great idea.
    What about Jasmine Guy. She is a mega talent. I don’t know why she is not currently being cast on a drama or comedy.
    I am a huge fan of this show and I will be really dissapointed if Kim Kardashian ends up on it. The only reason I am hopeful is that every season there is always one of those pseudo celebrities rumoured only for it be not true. Plus Florence Henderson has been rumored for 3 seasons already and Dan Marino said he is not doing it.

  • Christina

    I saw Alexandre Despatie staring at me from the main page and wondered what a Canadian diver was doing on here. Now I know

  • Tuzo

    Lita Ford — what a totally inspired choice!

  • pirate

    1)Brett Favre
    2)Ryan Seacrest
    3)Gordon Ramsay
    4)Flavor Flav
    5)Tiffany Pollard”New York”
    6)Tricia Walshe Smith

  • Tuzo

    I think he’s too old but Leslie Neilsen fits into the old person who has a sense of humor about the show slot.

  • Fryegrrrl

    How about some 80s pop icons like Debra Gibson, George Michael, Cyndi Lauper or Tiffany. Ohhhh, a Debbie vs Tiffany dance off – sweet!

  • angie

    Hmmm…Fran Drescher, Sybill Shepherd, Tony Danza, Ellen Degeneres, Kelly Ripa, Melissa Gilbert, the Rock, Paige Davis…for some reason it’s much easier to come up with female contestants!

  • Sarah

    Slezak – way to have Canadian content on your wish list!! Though his injured foot may pose a problem after it endures the Olympics.

  • charlie

    If I could cast anyone I would want someone like….Chris Noth, David James Elliot, John Stamos, Brody Jenner, Blake Lewis, Demi Moore, Jaclyn Smith, Denise Richards, Brandy

  • Anonymous

    So I’m pulling for Andrew Shue… yikes, this is a tranny hot mess if that is the cast for this upcoming cycle.
    And, where is our Queen of DWTS, Annie? On Va-Kay that she didn’t do the post?

  • Shannon

    Lita Ford would be amazing!

  • canuck1975

    Slezak, all the Canadian gays have been drooling over Alex since he was 16. It kinda makes me feel dirty though.

  • AJ

    My vote: Reba McEntire, she would be great, and Ty Murray is a good one, congrats Ty on the wedding, would love to see another A-Lister like George Clooney on there.

  • Marshmallow Peeeeep

    Here are my random choices:
    1) Delta Burke
    2) Peter Billingsley (Ralphie from “A Christmas Story”)
    3) Molly Ringwald
    4) Timothy Hutton
    5) Belinda Carlisle
    6) Bernadette Peters
    7) Steve Jobs 8) Sarah Silverman
    9) Lisa Kudrow
    10) Anderson Cooper

  • Anonymous

    A Few Thoughts:
    1) Cary Elwes (paging Westley!)
    2) Peri Gilpin
    3) Paul Reiser (um, pretty much MIA since Mad About You)
    4) Irene Cara (homegirl could dance like no other in Fame. LOVE her.)
    5) Lark Voorhies (If Elizabeth Berkeley can make a comeback, you can too)
    6) Ben Savage/Ryder Strong (because you can’t have Cory without Sean, I mean, it’s a true bro-mance)

  • fab

    Hummmmm alexandre…is so HOT!
    he might be the next big thing…he started acting here in Quebec!

  • queen of disrepair

    John Goodman
    Margaret Cho
    Magic Johnson
    RuPaul
    Angie Harmon
    Jason Seahorn (wouldn’t that be fun – husband and wife competing?)
    Elisabeth Hasselbeck
    Bai Ling
    Natalie Cole

  • Danielle

    Two words: Steve Urkel

  • m jackson

    How about:
    Patrick Dempsey
    Ian McKee (Bachelorette 2004)YUM
    Sarah Brown (Carly Gen Hospital)

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