'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: 'Selling out'

Celebrityapprentice_l“This is the biggest slaughter in the history of The Apprentice,” declared The Donald to the losing team, Empresario, just moments before the boardroom turned into a complete circus. (Hmm, that gives me an idea: what about a reality show called Celebrity Circus! Oh wait, that’s literally a show on NBC’s summer schedule. Go figure.)

So the circus came to town when a triumphant Piers, whose team won by a landslide in an art-selling challenge, decided to put his two cents in about why Omarosa never belonged on the show in the first place. “It’s called Celebrity Apprentice,” he explained. “If you are a genuine celebrity, then you do have the power to pick up the phone and get money out of people. I have believed from the start that Omarosa was here by default….” She retorted, “I’m here because Mr. Trump invited me, and if you keep saying that to him you’re going to be questioning his judgment. And I actually trust his judgment.” Is it bad that I think she had a valid point? Sometimes I wonder why Omarosa isn’t putting her money where her mouth is as a big-time lawyer grilling criminals, instead of as a reality-show contestant grilling (or whining about) her opponents. (Oh, and if you’re wondering, your regular TV Watcher, Kate, is on assignment, so instead you’ve got me as your commentator this week. Yay you!)

Piers continued to rub his big win in Empresario’s face (which,let’s be honest, is to be expected of him) and even suggested to Trumpthat he should fire two people. This cocky attitude seemed to have lita match under the O’s butt because as soon as Hydra was dismissed byTrump, she started making all sorts of ballsy claims about Piers —specifically about his sexuality. “I think he’s in the closet, I reallydo,” she said to The Donald. Trump, seemingly incredibly bothered bythis statement, then asked aloud to the powers that be, "Excuse me,does Piers want to come back in here and defend himself?" Luckily,Piers didn’t play into the drama too much — I can’t take anymore of theOmarosa vs Piers Battle of ’08 anymore! — and lightheartedly reenteredthe boardroom, kissed Trace smack dab on the cheek and walked rightout. Trace was a little stunned, but otherwise, I’d say the joke workednicely.

Going back just a little bit, this week the teams were instructed to choose an artist from the Moti Hasson Galleryand then sell the artist’s work at a chosen price point.  But before Iget into how the challenge panned out and ended up the "biggestslaughter in the history of The Apprentice,” (yeah, I’m justgoing to keep repeating that phrase for emphasis. I’m obviouslylearning a lot from The Donald), can we please discuss the gathering inthe golden Trump apartment? “Some people consider it to be the greatestapartment in the world,” he told the teams. “I would never ever saythat myself, but it’s certainly a nice apartment.” Um, Donald, you justsaid it. (Can you hear it now: “Most people tell me Ihave great hair, but you know that’s not something I would everadmit.”) Also, how has 18-month-old Barron already inherited thatserious I’m-about-to-tell-you-you’re-fired look? And is hemajoring in finance in nursery school or something because what childthat age knows how to pronounce the words “business” and “house” betterthan he can “hello”?

Anyway, the teams chose their respective artists. Hydra (led byPiers) took on Shirley Shor and priced her pieces starting at $10,000,and Empresario (led by Omarosa) went the opposite route by going withDavid Kramer, whose lower minimum sale amount allowed them to set aprice range ($2,000 – $5,000) that would hopefully give them a betterchance of recruiting donors. The best part of the deliberating overartists? Trace’s admission that he detests a certain kind of art. “It’snot hard for me if I was going on my own personal taste,” he told thecamera. “There are only a couple of them that I even get. The rest of’em is that abstract three-year-old-threw-up-on-a-canvas kind of stuff.I don’t like that stuff.” Amen to that!

Empresario’s plan was seemingly working out pretty nicely with theirwing — thanks to Omarosa directing people toward it — and seeing a lotof foot traffic. We even saw Trace sell two pieces almost immediately.Things took a turn for the worse, though, when one of Stevie B.’scontacts was persuaded by Carol to buy artwork from her. I still justdon’t get why Stephen didn’t try to stop him instead of standing therelooking mesmerized by the transaction and saying, “Be careful.”

In the end, Hydra earned a whopping $164,000 by selling 14 out of their 20 pieces, and Empresario in — all together now —the "biggest slaughter in the history of The Apprentice” earned only$7,000 for selling a mere three out of 16 pieces of their art. There’sno doubt Omarosa should’ve been fired for this one, but I don’t think Iwould’ve protested too much if it had been Stephen, due to his lack ofsalesmanship.

So, P-Dubs, tell me: Are you happy with the results of this week’sshow? Are you gunning for Trace to win like I am? Where the heck wasPiers’ contact, Hell’s Kitchen chef Gordon Ramsey? Finally, what was up with Omarosa’s ’60s go-go girl look last night?

Comments (32 total) Add your comment
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  • Ms Daisy

    Ding-dong, the witch is dead! The wicked witch is dead! Well, fired at least!

  • MsPisces

    I love Celebrity Apprentice. I hate to say it, but i’M GOING to miss Piers vs. Omarosa, but time for her to go. I also like Trace Adkins. But I think Piers might win. This is one of the best cast of people on Apprentice.

  • Anonymous

    Lindsay Soll, please write more tv recaps/tv watches…

  • Lyn

    I think Celebrity Apprentice is awful but Lindsay’s comments actually made me read after the jump. Thanks!

  • Ceballos

    Nice recap, even though I couldn’t help but detect a slight “pro-Omarosa” tone.
    Sorry, but I just think she’s in the discussion of worst people ever. And what’s more, not only does she connive and spin and turn things her way and throw more people under the bus than Roger Clemens, but every chance that she gets to step up, she either shies away (last week’s marketing challenge) or gets crushed (she’s never won a challenge as a PM and was involved in, yes Lindsay, the biggest slaughter in the history of the Apprentice.)
    Then, instead of taking some sort of responsibility, how does she defend herself? By questioning Piers sexuality! (Huh?)
    I actually sort of agreed with Piers in that Stevie B. should’ve gone home too…his performance last night as, arguably the person with the most contacts, was embarrassing.
    Finally, where is Trump getting his info from? I want to know who sits around discussing the greatest aparments in the world and how his made the discussion.

  • Anonymous

    Gordon sent his maitre’d from all of his shows

  • Bobbi

    This show has had me howling with laughter since the first show this season. Omarosa was not as entertaining this year though because she played to her stereotype too obviously. But good is being done with the money being raised and they are providing some funny, funny entertainment. I’m glad they’re getting another season. (I’m rooting for Trace too, but I don’t know if he can take it.)

  • Becca

    I think Piers definitely deserves to win. He has singlehandedly raised more money and has more creative ideas than any of the other contestants. He’s fun to watch and I’m rooting for him all the way.

  • Aries

    What, no mention of the “Omarosa-Free” previews for next week?? CLASSIC! But since NBC just had to pimp that unfortunate name one last freaking time made me vomit a little in my throat while chuckling… Still worth it to see her gone, tho.

  • Debbie

    After weeks of watching this seasons Apprentice – I was so eager to catch last nights episode – UNTIL, I had a work dinner to go to – somebody please tell me??? WHO GOT BOOTED?????

  • Paco

    3 Words: Best Episode Ever!!!

  • Anonymous

    really gay, you should visit ***gaysinglehunt.com_***,start your brand-new life. It’s our own community.Share romantic stories with lots of gay friends.

  • JSBach

    Way to go Piers! I was rooting for you to come out on top in your personal battle with Omarosa! I guess this makes Piers the favorite to win the show, though I would definitely watch out for Carol Alt, who stays above the drama and wins when it really matters (a la Kendra and Stephanie from previous Apprentice’s). Trace always has the good ideas, but seems to lack the drive of Piers. He should not be counted out. Stevie B started out strong but has been very louse the past few shows, whereas Lennox has only managed to survive due to his celebrity status being the biggest of the bunch and by shunning as much responsibility as possible. Lennox will be toast soon.
    Oh and I hope you keep doing the reviews Lindsay! I can’t stand Kate Ward and her constant whining about the Celebrity Apprentice being a terrible show and how she has to miss Lost to watch this show. Nothing ruins reviews more than reading them from a person who utterly loathes the show.

  • sam

    Glad to see Omarosa finally go–don’t like Piers, but he should probably win–and Donald Trump has the ugliest, worst taste apartment in the world!

  • Mala

    Piers is the best!!

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