The results are in: American Gladiators performed decently in the ratings last night on NBC, giving the network its highest-rated premiere for a new show since Heroes. But as a newcomer to the David-vs.-Hellga genre, I was mildly befuddled by what happened on my screen last night. I had to turn to my colleague Mandi Bierly, a Gladiators expert, for answers. Our IM convo went as follows:
Slezak: So Mandi, question: Did you actually enjoy American Gladiators last night? I ask because halfway through, I had to switch to Cashmere Mafia. Maybe the better question is: Why does everything on TV have to be a "two-hour event"?
Mandi: I liked it enough to watch it again if I stumble across it, but not enough to DVR. I was ready for it to end after an hour, too—I didn’t need to see the skateboarder’s kid watch his dad get his ass kicked anymore.
Slezak: I know, right? The firefighter dude dominated him! I’d have been furious if AA (pictured, right) had lost out in the eliminator round. Does that mean I actually cared about what was happening?
Mandi: Since you know the firefighter’s nickname is AA, then the answer is "Yes." But don’t worry: I would have flown through my TV if that had happened, too.
Slezak: Also making me want to fly through my TV: Hulk Hogan declaring, "Now we’re getting serious because up next are the guys"? Sexist much?
Mandi: Totally sexist. And hello, did he not just watch a female Gladiator take a contestant out of the competition on Power Ball? Laila Ali should have pounded him into the floor mats.
Slezak: Speaking of the women’s competition, what about that doctor, Venus? She worked so hard in med school, and her family came to this country…so she could be on American Gladiators? I wonder if she’s in my HMO plan?
Mandi: I think people who like to "work out" do enjoy testingthemselves. I wished I could have asked Venus’s parents if herexhausted look at the end of the Eliminator was real or fake. Shelooked like she wasn’t getting enough oxygen to her brain. Which, Iguess, she probably wasn’t.
Slezak: She literally said something about "fruits, vegetables, nuts,and seeds" helping her to defeat the gladiators.
Mandi: Wait, was that her, or the life coach lady?
Slezak: Oh it was the life coach! You’re right.
Mandi: I can’t believe I remember that.
Slezak: She was the lowest-seeded competitor
Mandi: Can we talk about Wolf?
Slezak: She sowed seeds of defeat early in the interview segment!
Mandi: You need to stop that.
Slezak: Sorry. Wolf. Ugh.
Mandi: The howling?
Slezak: The only thing crazier than his howling was that Toa dude (pictured, left), whenhe started speaking in tongues and then making that tongue gesture atpoor little AA.
Mandi: Toa is the Rock’s cousin and majored inpsychology–he’s all about intimidation. I don’t know if AA wasintimidated or just really, really confused. The men are freakin huge,no? Like Titan, who’s a four-time Mr. Universe.
Slezak: I love that you can identify individual gladiators. They alljust kind of morphed into one giant meat sandwich for me. And I onlyuse the term "meat sandwich" because they used it in a commentaryvoiceover.
Mandi: I interviewed them all on the phone. I can’t help it.
Slezak: I accept that.
Mandi: Oh, by the way, Pyramid is a new game, yes? That was cool. I wasexhausted just watching it.
Slezak: I don’t even like to walk up a flight of stairs to the vendingmachine, but I suppose if they had bottles of Diet Dr. Pepper at thetop of the pyramid, I could’ve made it past Toa.
Mandi: Add an autographed photo of Fergie and you might win the whole competition.
not worthy on any level
I definitely agree that the 2 hour event was draining. But I still thought the show was cool. That poor skateboard guy. His son will be disappointed in him for the rest of his little life.
If the show wasn’t good enough for Saturday morings in the 90′s what on earth makes NBC think it’s good enough for primetime in the donuts? Have we really fallen that far as a society?
I caught the end of the women’s “event”. Is it still called the eliminator? Anyway, I saw the Hulk and checked out. I’m sad to know that the Hulk drove me away from what would have been the “serious” half of the show. Who am I kidding, I lost the ability to digest American Gladiators when I turned 12.
So not worthy.
Look at us, aren’t we funny? We post our little IM chats to show how cool and hip we are!
Confession: I was totally into that show last night. Then again, I also enjoy watching hockey and rugby and lacrosse. I don’t know–it’s an guilty-pleasure escapist thing.
I swear, I don’t know what it is…I’ve been making fun of this show for three weeks, and then it came on last night and that was just it. Something about seeing an obnoxious Baby Boomer get thrown twenty feet by a man named Wolf was verrrry entertaining to me.
It’s funny because I said while watching Ninja Warrior last summer that we could use a U.S. version of it, or at least a return of American Gladiators. Unfotunately, this show wasn’t that. Too much talk, not enough Galdiating. The editing seemed like it was skipping things. And just like when watching football, I don’t need to hear from the players every time they are about to do anything. Before each event, I think the ref perfectly encapsulated what I found so bad about this show,
“Are…The…Competitors… … … Ready?… Are…The…Gladiators… … … … … …Ready?”
Bored Now. Recording Deleted
Some of the new stuff added to the show is overdone, but I enjoyed it far more than I thought. It’s probably better to DVR it, if only to skip past the overdrawn interviews.
I’ll take this over most reality TV anyday.
I watched the second half of the “special,” I am sad to say. What was sadder was the contestant who said that he had been waiting for 14 years to compete — and then lost. Badly. This writer’s strike needs to end, and quickly.
So totally not worth it. Neither is the poster who calls himself “ew sucks”.
Pyramid is not a new game, it debuted in the last couple of season on AG!
it was just like the old version, which makes it very appealing to those of us who loved it and watch the reruns on espn classic. the one thing that i could live without though was hulk saying brother every time he addresed a male contender. like four times every interview.
I’m with Jer…an American version of Ninja Warrior would be great! Got to love a show where the sideline reporter tells a bunch of children whose English teacher has just hit the water, “Your teacher has failed you.” Goooood times.
I was a big fan of the original AG, and still am whenever I visit my parents who get ESPN Classic since I don’t at my place. I have to say tho that I was slightly disappointed with the new incarnation. Oh sure it was cool to see all my favourite events redone, but I somehow get the feeling that they made them easier. The Powerball pods had bigger openings making basketball shots possible, the Pyramid had that “scoring zone” thingie that would give 5 points if they made it halfway up, and the Hang Tough course seemed considerably smaller. It’s obvious that they have a much smaller stage to shoot on than the old “Gladiator Arena”.
Also, someone please take the mikes away from Hogan and Ali. Way too much talking going on. I didn’t mind the rampant smack talk, but all the interviews and introductions were too much. The new AG needs to go back to focusing on the events more, rather than the people.
And I miss the old ref. He needs to give the new guy pointers.
Oh, and they totally ripped off Ninja Warrior with that rolling log thingie in the Eliminator, and why did there not seem to be a penalty for falling off the handbike? It was faster to take a dive and skip it!
I was a big fan of the original show, so much so that i competed in one of the last seasons. I do like the more modern, current, high tech mods they have done to the set. However, the smaller hang tough, no “Break-Through” (football run), only 4 gladiators in the Gauntlet, and the much shorter pyramid, as well as the oversized Power ball buckets, make the competition a little less interesting, and in some ways, less difficult. The contenders now are not doing too well on the reverse escalator. I know they are running for 1 min longer on average than the original eliminator, but just because you are tired, doesnt mean you should loose all coordination.
I do like the fact that even the leader can loose if he cant finish. Lets face it, if you cant finish the eliminator, why should you win.
The Glads are a little cartoonish too.
Contenders dont seem very tough
All that said, it still was entertaining as and I might just have to come out of retirement and try out for next years show