Is Josh Groban in league with the Prince of Darkness?

Joshdevil_lAnd the biggest-selling CD of 2007 is…get ready…Josh Groban’s Noël?! Yep, the adult-contemporary milquetoast outsold everyone else this year — and what’s more, his inexplicable megasmash landed at number one on Billboard‘s albums chart again this week, which also makes it the first-ever Christmas album to top the chart for four straight weeks. Yeesh. High School Musical 2 would have been a way less embarrassing year-end champ.

How can this be? How on earth has Groban’s latest beverage-coaster managed to defy the CD market’s downward spiral? Well, let me put it this way. EW’s Chris Willman happened to notice that the thoroughly lame Noël sold exactly 669,000 CDs this week. That’s just one inverted digit away from, you guessed it, 666,000. As Dana Carvey’s Church Lady might say: Could Groban’s sales secret be…Satan?

I know some of you may think this is a bit of a stretch. But I’m standing behind this as the most important supernatural pop-culture revelation since PopWatch’s Jason Adams found Rachael Ray’s cookbooks in the “Occult” section (speaking of which, she’s been doing pretty well for herself this week, too!) and/or that guy on YouTube “proved” that all my favorite rappers were working for the infernal Illuminati. Who dares to disagree?

Comments (96 total) Add your comment
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  • John Drennan

    Congratulations Josh! You deserve your success! Noel is great!

  • Shawn D.

    Um, yeah I disagree. The guy has incredible talent and I couldn’t be happier for him. Like him or not, the women of America, specifically middle aged Oprah watchers, adore him. And gay men like me swoon over his voice. So he will always do well with those two highly important niches in demographics.

  • Kami

    I can’t believe that you said that High School Musical 2 would be a better #1. What’s with all of the hatin’? I agree with what Shawn said. Josh has a lot of fans apparently and people like Christmas music. I’ve only heard a few songs on the cd, but the songs were pretty good and this is coming from someone with very picky taste and an intense hatred of sub-par remakes of Christmas classics. Please stop hatin’. It’s the holiday season afterall!

  • M. Shearer

    Um–I think I’d dare to disagree. What you may call “beverage coaster”-worthy “milquetoast,” my edgy and tragically hip friend, others may call refined talent. No dark mystery here. Young Mr. Groban’s voice is simply beautiful to listen to, end of story. Believe it or not, there’s a whole segment of the world’s population that still likes traditional vocal music. Not every artist needs to sound like a cat being murdered by a chainsaw, and not every message needs to be loaded with snarky cleverness, angst, lust, or the unspeakable darkness of the human condition. I don’t care to be told that it’s not “okay” to like Josh Groban, and apparently I’m in good company, since 669,000 others agree with me.

  • Anne

    I did not know a thing about Josh Groban until I heard his version of Ave Maria (found on the Noel album)a week or so ago. I am very impressed with his talent. He has an amazing voice and does justice to songs that most singers butcher (O Holy Night, anyone?). It is a fantastic album, and I am glad that it has done so well. I would particularly recommend listening to a song on the album entitled “Thankful” Very beautiful.

  • junior

    A) Josh Groban is clearly a robot sent to entrance the people of Earth with the notes he produces from his “vocal projection” box.
    B) I know no gay men, myself included, who “swoon” over his voice.
    C) Oprah had something to do with this. He went on her show recently. Robot and God, together? I’m surprised it hasn’t sold more.

  • Sadie

    Josh is incredibly talented (he actually SINGS people, none of that shouting mess) and deserving of his success. And he has a great sense of humor and would likely find this post hilarious — especially the picture.

  • Sadie

    Josh is extremely talented (he actually SINGS as opposed to shouting) and well deserving of his success. And I think he’d actually find this post hilarious, especially the picture.

  • Sadie

    Sorry for the double post — I wasn’t getting along with typepad for a sec there.

  • GOB

    Umm… didn’t Mandi just have a popwatch a few days ago saying how Daughtry had the best-selling album of the year with 3.2 million copies sold? Does Billboard have a “best of the year” list each week?
    Also, concerning Josh… a singer who sells his albums without the use of computerized vocal enhancement, rap collaborators, over-produced beats, personal scandals or highly sexualized imagery… it IS a wonder. Perhaps it’s his talent. Naaahh… popwatch says he doesn’t have any, so that can’t be it.

  • jamie

    It was on Oprah’s “favorite things” list – her fans will buy any and everything on that list. That’s why it’s sold so many copies. (It’s also a pretty decent Christmas album)

  • Brainiac

    Simon Vozick-Levinson, are you deaf, dumb, or both? Josh Groban is UNDENIABLY one of the world’s best vocalists. Just because he doesn’t happen to be your cup of tea, does not mean you have to be such a rude, ridiculous @$$hole about it. The Christmas album is fantastic, the arrangments are terrific, and Josh’s voice is SUPERBE. This type of article is inappropriate and uncalled for for any singer, let alone one of the world’s best. Get your ears cleaned out.
    And Merry Christmas.

  • Alice

    I know you think you are being funny and clever and cute, but Josh Groban is a real person and implying that he is in some way connected with evil forces might lead naive readers to the wrong conclusions. Implying that an actual person has negative qualities is not appropriate, in my opinion.

  • teresa

    Josh’s cd NOEL is number one in the country because he has the most beautiful baritone voice in the world. Maybe the country is ready for such a talented, well-trained voice over the yelling and noise that I hear so often today and what society today calls music. People may not like Josh’s music but you have to admit, no one can sing baritone the way he does and he can touch a heart with his music like no other. Oprah’s support may have helped but I’d say Josh has been blessed beyond measure to have a voice such as his and he has worked hard to get where he is at 26. His NOEL can sale itself.

  • Emoney

    Oh, Simon! Perhaps you were unaware of how rabidly dedicated the Grobanites are to their Messiah! I am not a fan, but I know better than to attach my name to anything disparaging him — you might wake up with a horse’s head in your bead for implying he’s in league with Satan. If you wake up at all… Good luck to you!

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