I wanted to be Marie Osmond when I was little (or, rather, I wanted to be an only-child version of Marie, so that I could sing duets with Donny and also marry him and share purple socks. Something kinky like that.) Many Dancing With The Stars watchers don’t get how the mediocre moves of America’s Corniest Sweetheart kept her afloat in the competition week after week, but I don’t think speed-dialing Osmondphiles are the only explanation. I find new-millennium Marie irresistible for one simple reason: she seems like she might just be bonkers.
Look no further than the horror show—I mean, baby-doll routine—she freestyled in Monday’s DWTS finals (click here if you haven’t seen it), and her hyper reaction (defensive, much?) when the judges panned it. At Marie’s most high-strung, she chortles and snortles and blurts out her thoughts, and you can just about hear another screw go loose. Then she pulls herself together and makes you wonder: Is this nearly-off-her-rocker persona calculated to stand out in today’s noisy reality TV landscape, or is she frazzled due to a personal life in shambles? The loyal little girl in me believes the latter, but regardless, she’s got our attention now, and she’ll probably be tenacious about letting it go. Since Donny & Marie went off the air, she’s been an actress, country crooner, queen of a lucrative home-shopping doll empire, and talk show cohost. She’s even tried her hand at radio (in this 2004 clip of Marie and Friends, she cracks herself up telling listeners about the time she peed her pants on a date. Not during the date. On the guy.)
So what do you think should be Marie’s next move? I’d never want her to do something completely nuts like go off her meds or lead sing-a-longs at Mitt Romney rallies, but what about this: Would ABC fire up a new season of The Bachelorette for her? Now, that would be crazy good!
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I am a huge Osmond fan and have been for more years than I can remember. I agree that Marie wasn’t the best dancer in the DWTS competition, but she was the most entertaining! She has had that bubbly personality all along, so I don’t see it as “bonkers” or “being off her meds”. She is an entertainer, and with 8 brothers, I’m sure she’s had to be very vocal just to be heard in the crowd. Plus, she’s a single mom of 8 kids. She’s going thru a divorce, fainted on stage, lost her dad, put her 16-year-old in rehab – who wouldn’t be a bit frazzled. More power to Marie! I think she proved that the 40-(almost 50)somethings can still hold their own with much younger competitors. All that said, I do agree that Marie’s doll routine was a bit over the top. I think it started out great, but after being “wound up” they should have just had her kick some bootie! She proved during the competition that she could do it!
She peed on a guy??? Like in the kinky sense of the phrase? Uhm…..alright then.
She should go live with Rachael Ray. By your description of Marie, they sound like twins.
I could have sworn that D&M had a short lived talk show on Fox daytime?
She might be a bit manic but she is entertaining in the giggly brunette sort of way. She did well on DWTS. Third place is better than the first person to go.
Death, for a next move, would be nice.
Brilliant idea regarding “The Bachlorette”. You really should send this to Steve McPherson or their heads of Alternative programming, Vicki Dummer and Joh Saade.
Brilliant idea regarding “The Bachlorette”. You really should send this to Steve McPherson or their heads of Alternative programming, Vicki Dummer and John Saade.
her on the bachelorette! that would be awesome. some older gentlemen, some younger guys…i mean the bachelor/bachelorette franchise needs a make-over. If she continued to remain on DWTS becase of her fans, imagine how great a dating show with her would be!
You were a fan of Marie Osmond when you were little? How old ARE you?
I love Marie, both the great moments and the idiotic ones (def not a fan of the doll dance). But she did great. She is amazing and a great gal. I’m getting pretty sick of all this trashing of her — not the best dancer but the best fun to watch. Without her, I wouldn’t have watched the season. Can’t have it both ways, DWTS.
hey Sara…..I was a fan of Marie when I was little (10 years old) too and I’m only 40. Is that OLD to you?
i am 36 and was afan of donny and marie’s variety show. I know i feel like a relic but I thought 36 was still considered relatively young
AMEN to all that Linda said!! Wish people would stop trashing her. Sheesh is Marie she wasn’t the best dancer, but she had tons of enthusiasm! And Sara..I too was a huge D&M fan (I’m 42) when I was a kid, get a clue.
And just how young are YOU?!
Marie is wildly entertaining, part-berserk/part girl next door. I’d watch anything she was on. I’ll bet lots of doors open for her now. BTW she looked amazing at the end of the season.
i watched D&M when i was little too (i’m 33) but come on, you have to admit she is shrill and manic, almost in a scary way. no wonder she fainted, right before she went down she was hopping around and screaming at len like she had just hit a crack pipe! i think they are a VERY weird family. hopefully now she can devote herself to those EIGHT kids full time, including one in rehab!!
Yes, Sara, I’m OLD! I’m 51. But you know what? That just means I don’t care what people think about me anymore, I say what I feel. Everybody that’s trashing Marie can kiss my grits. I still say that she was the best entertainer out there. She sure didn’t need the money, or notoriety that being on DWTS gave her. She is a millionaire in her own right from her doll-making business. Very much a business woman if you ask me – with a SPUNKY personality!
I wish all of you would stop cutting through every celebrity that isn’t perfect. This attitude is getting real old.
What’s the pee story?
I want to watch her underage kid OD live! Now tha’s entertainment, right, EW? That’s the sort of thing we all want to see!
Sheesh.
Look at it this way while you are munching on your super-sized meals…48 yrs old, 8 children, always smiling even when the going is tough. A happy loving supportive family. Easy to dish someone, but could it be out of jealousness? True, she was not the best dancer, but I saw her as very entertaining. I had no problem what so ever having her make the top 4….sorry Marie, I was a Jenny Garth fan.
I really enjoyed Marie. She definitely was bazonkers. That and the bachelorette comments lead me to suggest she replace that weaved out scuz New York. Call it Oh Vey Marie-eh!
Another Donny and Marie fan here – I’m proud to be 41. Yes, her dancing wasn’t at the same level as the others, and that doll routine was demented. But I admire her for trucking on (I would never have been able to do DWTS after my father’s death) and having FUN with the show. I would LOVE to see her as the next Bachelorette. Too bad the network execs would never cast a woman of her age.
Another Marie fan (I’m 40), anybody who grew up watching D&M faithfully each Sat. night way back knows the appeal of Marie. There is nobody from that era who gives me the happy goosebumps when I see them like D&M. But today’s youth (like Sara I imagine), don’t get that, I feel sad that their generations have disposable artists that nobody will remember 30 years from now.
Heh – Marie now has a line of DWTS inspired dolls
http://peoplefalltv.wordpress.com/2007/11/29/marie-osmond-debuts-dancing-inspired-dolls/
Oh Lord — what a wild ride this has been. I feel like a Red Sox fan except I didn’t have to wait 86 years — it was a hoot to have the Osmonds all back on various shows these past 10 weeks. I’m 48 – grew up with them — loved them — idolized Donny — but could not have imagined such an onslaught of PR as this has generated! I don’t care if the faint was fake — they epitomize show biz – the whole clan (even Wayne!) – she will be back — way to entertaining to ignore now!
Hey, if Marie gets into peeing on her dates,I say let her! Everyone should get a little kinky now and then. I mean, how many guys can actually say that MARIE OSMOND gave them a GOLDEN SHOWER? I think it’s hilarious especially when I have a Visual of the situation.
Anon needs to take the gun & bullets I send him/her and promise to use them, OK Anon?
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I’m truely a Marie Osmond lover and I would marry her straight away if she would have me. She’s always been one of the most beautiful people in the world to me.
Marie, if you read this just know that I’ve been drooling over you since 1976 when I entered my freshman year at Kents Hill School. You can view my linkedin profile and after you’ve taken a look I’d be happy to talk about marrying you. Love you Marie! Respectfully yours, Dean Barron