First exclusive peek out of San Diego’s Comic-Con: Robert Zemeckis’ Beowulf. If you aren’t familiar, this is the motion-capture CGI film based on the dark Anglo-Saxon epic about a mercenary named Beowulf (Sexy Beast’s Ray Winstone, pictured at left, with Anthony Hopkins) who sets out to unleash all kinds of kick-assery on the bloodthirsty Grendel, a monster that’s been terrorizing the kingdom. The movie’s November release should come as awesome news to teens, who’re subjected to reading the sometimes inscrutable Old English poem in high school lit class. It’ll also be awesome for said adolescents because Angelina Jolie appears in various states of nakedtude by way of the movie’s photo-realistic animation style. Did we also mention it’s also in 3D?
Screenwriters Roger Avary (Killing Zoe, Pulp Fiction) and comics demigod Neil Gaiman (The Sandman, Stardust) introduced the teaser, trailer, and 20 minutes of "reel 2" footage with this warning: "You’ll feel like you’re coming down from an acid trip." And after slipping on our Elvis Costello-ish 3D specs we were treated to the following images:
- A spectacularly six-packed Beowulf one-upping the lads of 300 by going into battle in his birthday suit… and without a weapon. Another possible nod to 300: a stark scene featuring a bunch of arrows flying in the sky.
- Grendel looking like a dead-ringer for Lord of the Ring’s Gollum. This creature also talks sorta funny: He’s the only character in Beowulf who speaks in Old English.
- A gruesome scene in which dead human warriors, like pieces of eviscerated meat slabs, hang upside down from rafters.
- SPOILER ALERT if you never did your homework: AngelinaJolie’s clothing-challenged hottie demon mama putting the moves onBeowulf after he killed her son Grendel. (Don’t judge. We all grieve inown ways.) This time, B. has a sword, which literally melts as they’retotally making out. Wonder if that’s a metaphor for something…
Gaiman and Avary laughed about how despite the carnal and carnage,they’re shooting for a PG-13. Then they stopped laughing and clarifiedthat no, really, they ARE shooting for a PG-13. (Random aside: The twoare now working to bring Charles Burns’ creepy-in-a-good-way comic-bookBlack Hole — an EW pick for one of 2005’s best — to the big screen.)
But at $1 million per second (at least, that’s the far-fetched figure Gaiman and Avary claimed), is Beowulf a total improvement over director Robert Zemeckis’ last (mis)adventure in motion-capture, the lifeless Polar Express? Reaction was mixed: Beowulfwas a vastly better — notably in the look and expressions of AnthonyHopkins’ character, the king — but such progress was spotty, provingthat ultimately Zemeckis has yet to slay his own demon: stiff-lookingcharacters.
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I don’t care if this movie totally sucks–just that one picture and description make it sound leaps and bounds better than the sad piece of crap “Beowulf and Grendel” starring Gerard Butler, which I had such high hopes for in 2005. It ended up being one of the worst, most pathetic films I’ve ever seen, a complete waste of the talents of Butler, Stellan Skarsgård, and Tony Curran.
Beowulf is one of my literary obsessions, and I really, really hope they do it justice this time. I hope all those big names and big money actually mean something.
1. It sounds cool, and Gaiman’s involvement makes me psyched.
2. The characters almost all looking like bad versions of the actors is a major annoyance.
3. The 3D stuff may rule but the new trailer is a bore.
That motion capture image looks pretty darn good to me. I thought it was actually Hopkins in live action.
That being said Nisha, you can’t tease people with a movie promising Angelina Jolie in “various states of nakedtude” and then come back with a picture of Anthony Hopkins and Ray Winstone (who I both love by the way…Winstone delivered in “The Departed”). That’s just not right.
Um, Beowulf and Grendel’s mother do not make out in the poem, but, if it’s Angelina Jolie playing her, some artistic license wouldn’t be that bad.
Also, Beowulf is neither difficult nor boring to read.
Hey I liked and enjoyed reading “Beowulf” last fall. I wish Hollywood would make “Grendel” by John Gardner into a movie. “Grendel” is the story told from the monster’s point of view. Gardner humanizes Grendel and does not write in Old English. “Grendel” reminded me of Mary Shelley’s “Frankenstein.” Although, some of the parts in “Grendel” are rather disturbing, even compared with the current “torture porn horror movies.”
I just want to say whoever thought Angelina = Grendel’s Mother, wins.
I think it’s a terrible idea for these movies to feature characters that resemble their voices, it’s a HUGE distraction, and unnecessary.
My first thought while watching this trailer was, Wouldn’t it look a lot better if they just shot the movie with live action actors against green screen, and then added in a bunch of FX in post, a la 300?
Admittedly, the characters are a bit of an improvement over the audio-animatronics from Hell featured in The Polar Express, but that certainly is some damn faint praise.
And the H’wood casting machine REALLY needs to get over their near-inexplicable obsession with Angelina Jolie (a.k.a. she with the bulging eyes, couch cushion lips, and giant throbbing vein in the middle of her forehead). Trust me, there are other, sexier, more talented actresses out there.
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