With the summer movie season in full swing, it’s a good time to review proper movie theater etiquette:
- No matter how bad the movie is, no one wants to hear you talk through it.
- If you go to the bathroom during the film, you are allowed one 5-second recap upon your return. If you can’t hear it or don’t "get it," sorry.
- Try not to laugh when a fellow audience member yells out something funny. You will only encourage him.
- If you show up after the previews have begun, you’ve forfeited your right to ask someone — especially an elderly person — to move seats so your six-person party can sit together.
- While we appreciate you leaving your seat to make that call on your cellphone, we can still hear you if you’re standing inside the theater doors. Step outside.
- If you’re one of only a few people in a theater, do not sit directly in front of one of them. Even in stadium seating.
- Do not spend five minutes looking through your bag for something after the movie starts. It’s dark. You’re not going to find it.
- Open the candy quickly. Yes, it will be loud, but only for a second. As opposed to what happens if you try to do it slowly. And you make noise anyway. And your friends feel the need to laugh at you.
Anything we missed?
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Leave your freakin’ gum at home! Nobody wants to hear you go CHOMP CHOMP POP POP SMACK SMACK all through the movie!
PLEASE DO NOT BRING INFANTS TO THE THEATER. Ever. No exceptions.
Also, no one under 10 in scary movies – Please.
No kicking the seat when someone is in it.
No throwing goobers at the neighbors (this really happened to me and my friend – all 6′3, 225 lbs of him – had to get up and threaten them!
No text messaging! You may have your phone on silent, but everyone’s eyes go immediatley to that bright flash of light on your screen as you text your friends!
This is kinda annoying to me: The concession line is like 5 miles long. You have about 20 minutes to figure out what you’re getting in line as you wait. When you get to the front, nothing annoys me like someone who needs to figure out what to get. Hello?, you just had half a lifetime to figure out if it should be Dr. Pepper or Pepsi. Keep the line moving. And stop bringing annoying babies to the theater. A 2-year old is not going to understand Spider-Man’s wrath against SandMan. I have a hundred of these, LOL! I was once going to write a book about them all, but you summed it up pretty well.
Please don’t turn on your cell phone/crack-berry during the last 10 minutes of the movie, I can see you little screens light up and it drives me cruise-azy!
If you arrive to a premiere after the movie has started, take the first seats you see and expect to be separated from your friends. Asking “are those seats over there open”? is a right reserved for those who arrive on time or early.
Those of us who braved long lines and scheduled well enough to show up early shouldn’t have to pay for someone else’s sin of being late to the theater.
I agree with Sharky. No infants. But if you do bring your infant into a theater and it starts to cry or fuss, LEAVE THE THEATER. It’s your own damn fault if you miss the movie because you brought your baby. That’s what babysitters are for. Can’t afford one? Too freaking bad. That’s just one of the sacrifices of being a parent.
I totally agree about the gum.
Not only did I have the misfortune of sitting on someone’s old gum once (totally ruining my skirt), but last time I went to the movies these two teenage girls next to me were chewing it like truck stop waittresses.
It was totally disgusting and extremely loud.
One last thing. Do not put your feet up on the seats in front of you until the movie has started. No one wants to put their head where someone else’s crusty shoe bottoms have been. I can’t stand it when people put their feet on the chairs in front before the movie’s started. We all pay for one seat, NOT TWO.
And there should be armrest etiquette as well. The person using the drink holder gets the front half, the person with their drink on the other armrest gets the back half.
The kids under 4 or 5 was my main complaint about the theater when I went to see Spider-Man 3. Probably what’s gonna happen at Pirates of the Caribbean in two weeks. I’d add DO NOT GIGGLE CONSTANTLY AT SERIOUS MOMENTS IN THE MOVIE. I find it annoying. Or DO NOT CONSTANTLY SAY HOW HOT YOU FIND (INSERT ACTOR OR ACTRESS’ NAME HERE). A group of ladies did that during Troy and a guy to their left actually had to tell them to shut up within earshot of everyone, adding the f-word for good effect. Did work, though, so I give him props.
These are great. My main peeve is when some doorknob needs to constantly point out the obvious to his/her friend. It’s as though they need to prove they get it or something. Drives me crazy.
Yes Snarky! When I went to see the Descent, there was a kid in front of us who had to be at most 3 years old. He was quiet and all, but just the sight of him there for that movie was pretty disturbing.
Keep your children quiet. Even if it’s a “kiddie” movie. My quiet child would like to hear it. It’s amazing to me how many parents don’t even tell their kids to be quiet; if you know your child can’t sit for 90 minutes then wait for the DVD.
Awesome list, Mandi! And I’d like to say that Paul U. also hit the nail on the head about text messaging. Or for that matter anything regarding your cell phone. Even if it doesn’t make any noise, that garish light competes for attention in a darkened movie theater. It’s distracting and annoying. Don’t do it!
And Snarky’s comments about bringing kids to movies are dead-on. I remember seeing “The Others” with Nicole Kidman, and there was a pack of kids rolling through the aisles — and I mean that literally. And I don’t want to hear adults blame the movies for their kids’ rotten behavior when they bring five-year-olds to “Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” I’ve seen that kind of thing too many times.
For action movies: I’m happy you’re excited, random audience member, but it’s infuriating when you yell “Did you see that!” or “Oh hell no!” whenever something remotely interesting happens. You ruined “The Bourne Identity” for me!
As parents, we have to keep our children in line. My kids are punished from seeing movies if they act up in a theater. And surprise! They’re well behaved.
And keep the bluetooth off your ear. I can see it blinking in my face.
Ya, no fighting in the theatre. Ya, a huge fight broke out during Spider-Man 3 last weekend (and sadly, was more interesting than the movie itself as disturbing as that was).
I agree with all of these, especially Jason. I despise it when a couple on a date sits near me and one person in the couple (usually the guy) feels the need to explain everything to his date. Just trust that your date is smart enough to get it on their own!
The problem is, the people who DO ruin the moviegoing experience will read something like this and assume it applies to everyone BUT them. Be warned: the advice here applies to EVERYONE.
Also, if someone is being rude or disruptive, get an usher. We can’t keep letting these people think they can get away with it.
I agree that there should be NO talking. Under any circumstance. Ever.
I particularly hate people who feel the need to say out loud what is about to happen. My eyes/ears work fine; I don’t need a surrogate to watch a movie.
I like the 5-second recap after the bathroom trip rule…as someone who *always* has to go in the middle, I either figure out what happened myself or ask my husband later. Suz, the presence of a 3-year-old at “The Descent” is absolutely shocking – he was probably quiet because he was so flippin’ terrified! Poor kid.
Wow, I thought I was the only one who finds all this stuff (especially the kids and text-messaging) unbelievably annoying. I would add that in addition to not kicking the seat in front of you, could parents please make sure their KIDS aren’t kicking the seats in front of them too?
I also have to state the obvious because it actually happened to me: DO NOT answer your cellphone when the movie is on, even if it’s to say “I’m at a movie. Can I call you back?” Truly unbelievable.
BTW, everything here that everyone said should be posted on every cinema. I agree particularly with Ep Sato’s feet thing and seating after the movie started thing. UGH…sorry laters, suck it up and just sit godamnit.
if you go to a foreign film, DO NOT READ THE SUBTITLES OUT LOUD!! This happened to me while watching Hidden Tiger, Crouching Dragon. Of course, i did see it the Bronx(take from that what you will)
http://www.logcapture.com/2007/05/audience_tips.html
Just for emphasis:
Number one rule: Don’t bring kids to non-kid movies. No excuses. Get a babysitter or wait for the DVD.
If you must sleep, no snoring.
I agree with the idea of posting something like this list on the walls in all the cinemas around the United States.
If you cannot be bothered to pay attention to the screen, then do not interrupt my experience but asking what is happening or what the screen says. This happened during Titanic, which sadly annoyed me more than the damned movie.
If one more punk kid kicks my seat, so help me, I will actually lay him out in the aisle. I hate people’s children or any age when they are not well behaved. If you cannot act right in public, then stay at home until you learn manners.
If you arrive late to the movie, don’t stand around in the aisle for like 15 minutes trying to see in the dark if there are empty seats for you and your friends!! Suck it up and sit all the way in the front. It’s your own fault for not getting there on time. It’s so distracting when someone stands in the aisle, especially if you are sitting in an aisle seat. It also drives me nuts when someone takes the empty seat right next to you when the movie is about to start and proceeds to slurp their drink and chomp down on their popcorn!! (this happened to me when I saw Bable) Doesn’t anyone in the world have manners anymore???