Our weekly count of the epic battle between Randy Jackson’s (and, occasionally, Paula Abdul’s) verbal tics "dawg" and "pitchy" concludes…
Top 16: The Guys
Dawg — 4
Pitchy — 2
Top 16: The Gals
Dawg — 0
Pitchy — 3
SEASON TOTAL:
Dawg — 25
Pitchy — 22
And so the winner for the semi-finals is: Dawg!
As we enter the Top 12, we’ll be resetting the count and starting over. Why? Well, PopWatchers, after reading your comments, it appears there are some knee-jerk statements that fall from judge Simon Cowell’s mouth that also get your respective goats, so we’ve decided to make this a three-way race. But which of Simon’s well-worn verbal tics to choose? That’s where you come in. Submit your most annoying statement from Simon — something easily and definitively countable, and frequent enough to give Dawg and Pitchy a run for their money — and we’ll include the consensus choice in our new competition. Because, if we’re being honest, if we’re not being rude, one million percent this will make the battle of the tired judge commentary a breath of fresh air. Or, er, something.
Karaoke, Lounge Singer, Cruise Ship, Amusement Park or High School Performance all come to mind…
“very cabaret”
“a bit karaoke”
and the all-time worst (other than that new pouty lip he’s doing):
“…to be honest.”
“I don’t mean any offense, BUT”
“I feel like i just watched a cruise ship performance.”
“well, the good news is that you look good.”
“Well, I’m not falling out of my chair…” Backhanded compliments kill me!! I will also second the “To be honest…”
Anything that starts with “it was like watching….” and then has some insulting analogy after it!
‘… I’m not being rude.’ From Scowl, I mean Simon Cowell. As if adding that to the end of a sentence qualifies for anything but.
“If I’m being honest … ” or the word “ghastly.”
Definitly Karaoke, Hotel Bar, Theme Park, and Cruise Ship
Very cabaret. Does he even know what a cabaret really is? Sheesh.
“a bit karaoke”
“very cabaret”
“dreadful”
“I’m not jumping up and down”
“there are others who are in a different league”
or simply “it wasn’t good.”
“I’m just being honest.”
We should justs count every time Simon compares one of the singers to any other type of singer. (i.e. lounge singer,karaoke singer, or cruise line singer)
What about “it was like someone’s drunk father/uncle at a wedding…”; it was reserved for Taylor last year but I’m fairly certain he’s used it once already this season…
“Sorry” (When he’s really not.)