What's the ugliest award out there?

Uglyaward_lMaybe you’re tired of reading about the Oscars by now. Did you guys know the Oscars are Sunday, by the way? That’s really soon. Anyway, take a breather and check out Radar Online’s compilation of The Ugliest Awards in the World. Some of them are pretty awful, though I do like Germany’s International High Rise Award because it’s just an annoying stack of paper, which reminds me of basically anywhere I sit. Way to bring it down to my level, Germany! Our pick for the truly most hideous statue is Chicago’s International Documentary Award (pictured). What is inside there, in the middle of the cone? Spiderweb? Dusty oil painting? Dreams? Plain gold Mr. Oscar Man is looking pretty sharp right now.

If I had to design my own award for general excellence, it would be a platter of nachos composed of sand dollars, thick-cut gemstones, and twinkling sequins for where the light hits the chili. And then a dollop of real guacamole on top, just to mess with people. What about you?


Comments (12 total) Add your comment
  • Ep Sato

    EP Sato’s golden scooter award would have a big Vespa standing over a massive sized set of lips. There’d be a button behind the lips that would make sassy comments that only the statue itself finds funny. It’d say stuff like “I’m not drinking Lost’s KoolAde anymore”.

  • Vivi

    What the f*** is that? (pictured)

  • Nancy Walker

    It’s hard to believe that anyone would give an award as hideous as this one. This is not creative, this is just junk.

  • furry_tom

    A plastic trophy with a stainless steel robot doing the Worm on top.
    I’d also redesign the Grammy award as a tin ear with a Q-tip crammed in it.

  • David

    Haha! Guacamole, huh?
    I’d also try to mess with people by making the award pointy in all places so as to assure no one could hold it or put it down. Imagine that acceptance speech….. I know!

  • Ceballos

    The award that accompanies looks like someone extracted images from my nightmares, welded them together into a “trophy”, and then decided to give it to International Documentaries in Chicago…that thing is AWFUL.

  • Michael

    And I thought the Dancing With The Stars trophy was bad. At least, they even admit it is ugly.

  • furry_tom

    The Webby reminds me of the episode of the Simpsons where Homer tried to design a mascot for the Olympics.

  • daisyj

    My award, the Bangie, would be given for the best use of pyrotechnics in a motion picture and would, on presentation, explode. There would be very few repeat winners.

  • Ping Cutler

    Gawd! What a bizarre and fascinating article that was…what is this Radar magazine anyway…?

  • NYCGirl

    “The Edgar Allan Poe Award
    At first, we happily assumed this trophy was created to celebrate people whose eyes look exactly like their eyebrows.”
    That cracked me up.

  • furry_tom

    RE: the Bangie
    Rather than losing all of our quality special effects people, the award should be accepted on their behalf by disposable industry hacks. “Accepting this award on behalf of Joe Everyman is director Uwe Boll.”

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