Martha matches Howard shock for shock

151318__howardmartha_lSo it’s official. Martha Stewart is a badass. Earlier this morning, the Queen of Domesticity was interviewed by King of Shock Jocks Howard Stern on his satellite radio show to commemorate their one-year anniversary at Sirius. For a woman who has her own line of linens and a guy who could own a porn empire, one would have surely expected a conversation between the two to be, um, a recipe for disaster. But Stewart was game. Yes, there were some mildly awkward moments — no matter what, we do not, I repeat, we do not want to hear about Thumper, Lady Martha’s sex toy — but it’s a rare and cool occurrence that a woman of her caliber could roll with Stern’s trademark punches without being offended or emotional, and at times, even give him a taste of his own medicine.

She talked about modeling as a teenager for Clairol and Tarrington cigarettes, and how she wasn’t quite good enough to be a Ford model. She defended herself when Stern called her stubborn for going to prison instead of taking the plea deal. “Do you know what pleas are?” she said. “Pleas aren’t guarantees. They didn’t guarantee no jail time.” She talked about dating Anthony Hopkins (“I couldn’t get past the Hannibal thing.”) and New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg (“That was years ago.”). When Stern asked her if she’d say hello to Donald Trump at a party, Stewart said she’d turn her back on him. And when asked about rumors that some of Stewart’s employees were caught spying in on Rachael Ray’s show, she claimed that they went to the show, even signing in, and noted that “I’m the mother of these how-to shows. She cannot cook like I cook. She cannot craft like I craft.” Ouchie.

addCredit(“Howard Stern: Sonia Moskowitz/Globe Photos; Martha Stewart: Barry Talesnick/IPOL/Globe Photos”)

The best moments came when Stern asked questions that would make most people wriggle, Michael Richards-style, in their seats.

When Stewart mentioned that she’d like to go out on more dates,Stern said, “But I thought you wanted me.” She responded, “I did. Butthen I met you.”

When he pressed on about prison life — “Who came on to you?”, shereplied, “Some girls who looked like boys. Some had mustaches andbeards. I’d be walking to the street and I’d be like, ‘How’d that boyget in here?’ And it was a girl. They’d want to have lunch with me,like a lunch date. Everybody in prison has a business plan. I’d havelunch with them if they were interesting.”

He followed with, “You never saw two girls getting it on?” “Nah,”Stewart said. “Not naked. But there’d be trysts.” Then Stern: “So Iguess you have to pleasure yourself in prison.” “You know what,” saidStewart, “five months isn’t a long time.”

Stern: “Have you ever had anything done?”
Stewart: “No.”
Stern: “No boob job?”
Stewart: “No, I think my boobs got bigger.”
Stern: “You’re a D cup, right?”
Stewart: “Nah.”
Stern: “C?”
Stewart: “Yeah.”

As Stern was wrapping up, he advised that the next time Stewart ison the show she go commando. “Wait, are you wearing underwear today?,”he asked. Stewart, without missing a beat, said, “No… bye Howard.”

Badass, right?

Comments (34 total) Add your comment
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  • Fatima

    I love it!
    I find it hilarious she manages these incredibly awkward moments here, but can’t help but avoid them on her own show.

  • Lynny

    Martha rocks. I always wondered why people would go on his show and then get offended. Duh?! Just roll with it and laugh. Good job, girl.

  • Ep Sato

    Dude, Martha lives in New Jersey AND went to a federal penetentiary. While it’s not as bad as “OZ”, it’s rare to see an ex-con who’s a p*ssy.
    If Stern thought he’d be able to break her, I am glad to see he was proven wrong. And Martha Stewart likes to go commando? Someone please get her Paris Hilton’s phone number so some paparazzi can share Martha’s nana with the world.

  • junior

    How could it be possible for my already way-too-high admiration for the woman go even higher? Reading this.
    I LOVE MARTHA!
    (but Martha, we need to talk about getting you a new exec prod for your show. Mark Burnett, really?)

  • DMC

    I never hated Martha Stewart, but I never had an opinion on her before the whole insider trading thing went down. Since then, I’ve been watching and paying attention.
    Martha has said that she preferred her old show because it wasn’t live and she had more control over the production.
    Personally, I think her new daily show is leaps and bounds beyond the previous incarnation. Why? Because, as we now know, Martha Stewart is a badass.
    She’s also surprisingly funny. Her personality is incredibly strong, and she has a really sharp, dry wit, which was absent on her overproduced show. I love how candid and awkward her new talk show is, and the best part always is watching her roll with the punches, as Ms. Juarez writes.
    Best of all, it seems like Martha simply wills her way through every possible major life detour, and that alone makes her probably one of the best role models for women that we’ve got. Madonna gets all the credit for being a self-marketing genius, but Martha Stewart did it first and continues to reinforce her accomplishments with her strongest asset: her personality.

  • adam

    Who’s Howard Stern? I seem to remember someone with that name used to have a very popular radio show, but no one really talks about the guy anymore. Hoo hoo, tell em Fred!

  • Deb

    Martha is a strong woman who doesn’t take crap from noone and you have to admire someone like that, even the government tried to break her and failed. I think little girls everyone need someone like her, not Barbie to look up to and admire.

  • BLM

    The interview rocked and Howard Stern is the King! Interviews like this is the reason EVERYONE should have Sirius satellite radio–if you don’t have it, you’re missing out on some of the best entertainment in the world!

  • Dave

    I’m not a particular fan of either Howard or Martha, but I think it’s cool that Martha was able to match wits with the so-called king of all media. I’ll bet Stern’s a fan of hers now (we all know he likes it when people rise to his challenges, as opposed to cower beneath them), and I wonder if she’d ever have him on her show…now THAT would be entertaining!
    Btw, Ep, as a native of NJ, I LOVED the NJ/federal penitentiary comment as a basis for her badassness!

  • Tim

    Howard Stern is simply the best celebrity interviewer working. There is no better. People get so hung up on others’ interpretation of what Howard should or shouldn’t ‘be’ that his skills are completely derided. It’s unfair. Check his past interviews with Paul McCartney and Barbara Walters, the man is a genius.

  • Martha Rocks!!!

    Martha is the #1 Woman in the World!!!
    Move over Hillary, let Martha run the country!!
    The White House will be the most beautiful, clean, organized, well run house ever in our history!!!
    The parties would be absolutely amazing.
    The history that we would learn from her would be inspiring.
    This country would be run like a tight ship with all her
    little elves pitching in everywhere.
    The rest of the world would benefit greatly as she would be sure every other country would be well taken care of and decorated beautifully I might add!!
    Vote for Martha in 2008!!!!!

  • nd

    Howard rules and this interview was great live. Compelling radio.

  • Porn Girls

    Porn Girls

    Pornstars: Jada FirePornstar: Jada FireCountry: United StatesBirthdate: 1977-1-9

  • Kalya

    Why would anyone pay mind to Howard the human trash can Stern?

  • PS

    By the way, how ugly is Howard Stern?

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