Nov 20 2006 06:33 PM ET

Revel in... the power of... 'CSI: Miami'

Categories: Television

93414__david_lIf you’re a fan of CSI: Miami, or you’re not, or, especially if you’re like me, and tune in occasionally just to revel in the sheer lunacy of David Caruso’s performance as Horatio Caine, then the following YouTube video is for you. (Thanks, MetaFilter, for the heads-up.) It’s clip after clip after clip of the hyper-serious one-liners Caruso delivers before each episode’s opening credits (along with the opening howl of the theme song, the Who’s "Won’t Get Fooled Again," as a rimshot). All together now, let’s get in touch with our inner Carusi: "Well it looks like…" (sunglasses on) "…something…" (dramatic pause) "…caught her." (YEAAAAAHHHH!) Good times, people, good times.

Comments (1-30) of 40 Add your comment

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  • Suzanne

    That was a great link on youtube.
    I don’t get the attraction either. I watch it sometimes in the summer when what I usually watch is in reruns. At that time this season I watch Studio 60. But when we do have it on, my husband usually does a Caruso imitation. I mean, it’s like having Star Trek on and not doing Kirk.

  • Patti

    Strangely I don’t think Grissom’s oneliners are usually that cheesey. Of course they aren’t accompanied by the whole sunglasses ritual. That could be the difference (or not).

  • Liza

    Had I known Caruso’s cheap one-liners would be on YouTube one day, I would have found something else to do between 10 and 10:05 on monday nights. I usualy watch just to hear what he’s going to say and change channels when the credits come on.

  • mike

    Sometimes you eat the ham and sometimes the ham eats you. YOWWW!

  • Betsey

    this is so money. i could not stop laughing. it’s hard to figure out why CSI: LV is so good and CSI: MIA is SO. BAD. the whole show is terrible lately. i dont need the characters to explain every little stupid thing to me. we are smart enough by now to know a bullet is going to ballistics and a swab is going to DNA. geez.

  • dsven

    David Caruso: The William Shatner of the new millenium.
    SHAT-TASTIC!!

  • Christine

    Hilarious! It really is the most self-righteous, cornball show.

  • Tommy G.

    This is the only reason why I watch CSI: Miami – Horratio’s one liners (and occasional vigilante shooting) are the best part! What – did you really think I tune in for the believeable plotlines and intelligent dialogue?

  • Mozz

    ha ha ha… that’s great… anyway, off topic, but a very cool friend of mine is in the show tonight!!! so I’m sending shout out to Teddy Sears!!! via E.W. watch C.S.I. Miami tonight, cause he’s on, and catch the onliners.
    PS: MIKE! Sometimes you eat the ham and sometimes the ham eats you.
    Love IT!

  • Amber

    Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! My man loves this show and I can’t help but snort in disbelief at the whole thing. SO cheesy and do they really think the audience is THAT dumb? Also, notice how David Caruso cocks his head to the right all the time, especially if he’s trying to be serious.

  • Scott

    David Caruso is one of the best actors on TV who doesn’t bother to act anymore. However, his performance does make for one great drinking game: Take a shot each time he takes off, or puts on, his sunglasses. You’ll be under the table in twenty minutes.

  • Jakeem

    Where have you guys been? He’s been doing this since 2002! I believe he’s simply decided to play Horatio Caine as if he was Batman without the cape and cowl. Just notice how many times he exits a scene Batman style: Now you see him; now you don’t!

  • Laura

    ROFL!!! I could not stop laughing while watching this thing. I think the constant cuts to the “Yeeaaaah!” theme music is what really pushed it from hilarious to rolling-on-the-floor hilarious. Dsven said it: Caruso IS the new Shatner.
    Thanks for posting this Slezak!

  • nathan

    Thank God for David Caruso, if not for him there would be no reason to watch that show at all……..Yaaaahhhhhh.

  • Tim

    Two reasons why I watch CSI: Miami: Emily Proctor. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!
    Can’t forget the ‘Alex, what do we have here’ line as H kneels by a corpse.

  • ncgirl

    He should be saying…”Try the scenery, It’s dellliicious.” (YEAAHHHHH!)

  • Rachelle

    The reason he has so many “one liners” is because he can’t remember 2 lines in a row. If he has to remember too much they have to cut.

  • Jason

    Ah, this was hundreds of times more enjoyabled than actually watching the entire episode. Thanks for the great comments.

  • peace pipe

    I love CSI Miami! It’s such a guilty pleasure. Over the top? Sure. But part of the fun is mimicking Caruso’s one liner of the night as it cuts to the opening credits. Plus the scenery is gorgeous.

  • newbie

    This is brilliant! I watch this show purely for my weekly dose of HAM. There’s no question, he is Captain Kirk as ultra-fair-skinned Miamian. Every single line is: Super slow delivery, name of who he is addressing, stiff swaggery punchline. I enjoy Hawaii-5-0 reruns, and his acting carries on that divine lack of subtlety.

  • Lois

    CSI Miami is my favorite show. I think David Caruso does an excellent job portraying Horatio Caine. Remember, all this actions, right down to nodding his head, is all directed to him. It’s not his choice.
    Also, the rest of the cast are excellent, as well. Plus you have the beautiful scenery.
    I think it’s a great show.

  • Rebecca

    Don’t be fooled, Lois. Caruso has a lot of freedom on Miami, which probably entails how he delivers his lines.
    I couldn’t get through the video. Not only did it bug me, but I knew most of the lines. :| Nowadays, the only thing that keeps me watching Miami is Emily Procter and Jonathan Togo. I love those two.
    “(Insert name of CSI here), get that to the lab.”

  • lacyleanne

    you guys – you are ALL so fooled by the fabulous acting talents of a wonderful and gifted actor – DAVID CARUSO! You have to remember 1) he doesn’t write that junk, and 2) Horatio is a character David has created fromthe ground up – semi-annoying habits and all.
    Joke’s on you! Caruso rocks!

  • Connie

    There is so many reasons, I watch at CSI:Miami.
    I love David Caruso.
    There is more drama the others, and more guns used.
    David Caruso as Lt. Horatio Caine, he is cool. Speedle’s death, very sad, and Eric Delko is grrrr.
    The CSI series are not a like, you can’t say that CSI, CSI:Miami and CSI: NY are about the same thing. They are so not alike. They are all cool in it’s own way.
    I like CSI:Miami very much, more than CSI and CSI:NY. But that’s just me.
    I want own all of CSI:Miami season.
    I own seasons 1-3:D
    I’am so a CSI:Miami freak:D
    I LOVE IT.

  • Beverly Morra

    I never like David Caruso in NYPD, so I had avoided this CSI for long time. Then I just happened to watch an episode one eve. and I was hooked. It is very different than other CSI’s, I usually watch the real things, but this fiction story I never miss, well done David, well done other members of the cast as well. By the way, what has happened to the ex.sister-in-law of David’s’, she was so beautiful, after his new wife died, will she still be on the series? I hope so, love this program, keep up the good work all of the head hauncho’s, I’ll be watching. Yours, Bev Morra

  • travis martin

    David caruso is a horriable actor. why does he always have to look at the ground and then look at people from an odd angle thats not good acting thats haveing a lame trick to appear dramtic grissom is way better!

  • Vixen

    caruso is a class a jerk. He can’t act his way out of a paper bag.
    http://davidcaruso.personalfanpages.com/

  • Olivia

    I did find it funny about his one liners and how he puts his sunglasses on when he says them.. lol but i do love the show and im a csi fanatic of all the series exept for ny cuz its fake and not as interesting as the other series.

  • Bill

    Whoever said Caruso is the new Shatner would be the smartest person in the world!
    I’m waiting for the “Caruso Does Caruso’ album!

  • Joe

    “Well you know what they say Frank..”
    *puts on sunglasses*
    “Speed kills..”
    #THE WHO#
    ROFL – it’s UBER CHEESE !

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