I hate The Gap's ads so much right now!

154835__gap_lDear Gap,

I’ve been meaning to write you a letter for about a week now, but I had to work on controlling my inner rage monkey (like the ones at the beginning of 28 Days Later) so I didn’t damage my keyboard.

I think I’m ready now, though, so here goes: I loathe your new ”The Skinny Black Pant”’ ad campaign (click here to see it), the one where you marry the image of Audrey Hepburn getting jiggy in Funny Face to AC/DC’s ”Back in Black,” and turn her into an unwitting pitchwoman for your product. The woman is dead. She did not ask to have her jaunty moment of movie self-expression turned into an idiotic call to pair a white sock with a black trouser (even if her son approved the message). And no, I am not bitter just because I’m allergic to sit-ups, and therefore not an ideal candidate for a look that’s best displayed over the most slender of physiques. The ubiquity of your campaign — on TV, on billboards, on subways and in magazines — only serves to fuel my fury. There are few things more gag-inducing than having a trend stuffed down your throat (no, actually, not everyone in khakis, okay?!). And worst of all, you’ve managed to make me despise Audrey Hepburn a little bit, and for that reason, I hate you.

Going back to baggy,
Michael Slezak

Comments (132 total) Add your comment
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  • Lesha

    Thank You!! I’ve been telling everyone I know how I loathe those ads.

  • Andi

    I concur!

  • Sven

    Nothing could make me despise Audrey Hepburn even a little bit, but the ad does make me hate the Gap for whoring her image this way. Certain legends should be considered taboo, and Audrey Hepburn is one of them? What’s next, Kate Hepburn promoting Depends?

  • Tawdry Audrey

    I liked it at first because my name is Audrey. Also because I am a narcissist. The windows outside the store say “Hello Audrey” and I almost say “hi” each time. But here are my problems with the ads:
    1). Everything Michael just said, and
    2). I tried on those skinny pants and my calves are just too freaking big for them. Going back to flares.

  • Cassie

    Slezak, you clearly read my college newspaper and saw my opinion article expressing these same sentiments. Next time cite your source. But besides that, I absolutely agree with you in every way (but I heart Audrey too much to let Gap ruin her for me). My friends thought I was overreacting but I’m glad to see I’m not the only one!

  • Paul U.

    thanks for that…when I saw the ad for the first time, my jaw dropped to the floor! it’s so wrong!

  • melissa

    I like the idea of pairing Audrey Hepburn and AC/DC, and I like the cool dancing visuals and the song. But yet there’s something unnerving and ultimately turn-the-channel-quick inducing about it all. Super yuck.

  • Adam

    I like the ads, and the great thing about them is that they keep Audrey’s name in public mind. Being 23, most people my age don’t know many old Hollywood stars. Using ad’s like the one in question remind everyone just how stylish and legendary stars use to be. And it has the possibilty to open up a whole new, younger audience for old Hollywood stars, like Audrey.

  • Margaret

    Anyone remember the travesty of “Kerouac wore khakis”?

  • peanut galler

    Loves the ad, loves Audrey Hepburn, loves ACDC, and loves skinny black pants!

  • Nicole C.

    Audrey Hepburn was a symbol of elegance and poise, with a hint of rebellion. However, even if she were alive today, I don’t think she’d be hoofing it to AC/DC. Call it a hunch.

  • lizzle

    That commercial is definitely creepy and oh-so-wrong, but there’s something about it that fascinates me and I can’t look away, except to hide my face in shame once it’s over.

  • Ed

    I have a love/hate relationship with those Gap ads. I love them because it makes Audrey look silly and I hate them because they make Audrey look silly. I’m perplexed.
    What I despise the most is that the skinny jean is coming back into vogue. Just when I found my perfect jean, the low-rise boot cut, Gap goes and changes their style.
    Gap is o-v-e-r anyway so I’ll shop at Express.

  • jon

    While I agree that people my age (23) should know a little more about the stars of yesteryear, this is not the way to teach them. The commercial takes the funky, sweet choreography of the film and mucks it all up and Audrey’s sampled “A girl want to dance… A girl want to dance…” sounds strangely robotic. Also, I just have a problem with the idea in general. Were those Gap pants she was wearing in “Funny Face?” Because that’s what people who don’t know better will think.
    Go watch PBS when they rerun classics like “Sabrina” and cherish old, dead Hollywood that way (I just caught “Bringing Up Baby” with Cary Grant and Katherine Hepburn and laughed my a$$ off in addition to perfecting my Hepburn voice impersonation)

  • Sunny

    i love the ads and the jeans. Of course, I’m a Gap kind of gal and have always been infatuated with their ad campaigns.

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