Dear Janet,
Look, I know we haven’t been on speaking terms since I took you to task for your dismal single and video for "Call on Me." You felt betrayed by my "what have you done for me lately?" attitude; I was disappointed by your horrid choice of lead single for the upcoming 20 Y.O. But hey, that’s the way love goes, right?
Anyhow, I just got back from vacation and watched your new video for "So Excited," and — whew! — it’s a major improvement. Granted, I have no idea what the heck you’re saying in that breathless kitten voice of yours (surely, a lyric like "I’m rubbin’ that spot for you, anytime that you want me to" constitutes an FCC violation, no?), but no matter: It’s good to see you gettin’ your dance on. When it comes to choreography, you’re the queen. I mean, who else could pull off that move where you yank your naughty dancer’s hair and give him the nuh-uh finger wag? Hawt! That said, just a few concerns:
1) How come you shot half the video in Flash-cam™? The way your top magically appears and disappears — leaving you to clutch your girls — left me clutching my pearls. Yeah, I know, you’re staunchly unapologetic for Nipplegate, but next time, how ’bout just you, your backup dancers, and a stationary camera? Show these kids that good choreography doesn’t start and end in the editing room.
2) What’s with the sudden appearance of that yellow sportscar at the two-minute mark? If it’s part of some product-placement initiative, I hope they’re paying you well.
3) Also not getting the occasional skeleton people. Were you trying to use up some excess FX budget?
4) Making out by the men’s urinals? You nasty!
5) Oh, and one more thing: There’s nothing goofier than being filmed while sensually eating a strawberry. Seriously.
Anyway Janet, good to have you back in form. See you on the charts.
Toodles,
Mike
P.S. Thanks for throwing a little work in Khia’s direction…glad to know I’m not the only one still digging "My Neck, My Back."
Comments (1-30) of 62 Add your comment
yeah I did not get the sportscar at all.
Skeleton people and making out in the restroom? That sounds suspiciously like the Chemical Brothers video for “Hey Boy, Hey Girl.” Janet blows.
It is too bad that Janet has become a flasher. She should realize that what she is doing is not talent, it is just sad!
Michael girl, glad you touched on this issue because I’m going off:
1st, Janet, So Excited was “exciting” the first 2 or 3 seconds that I listened to it, but now I’m bored – again.
2nd, your lyrics, sexual exploration, so 3 albums ago; Madonna did Erotica back in 93 and has come back 2 more times since then – “what have you done (different) for us lately?
3rd, the So Excited video is a mesh of Don’t Stop and all your videos since Control, get some new moves.
4th, I won’t be buying your album when it comes out on the first day, I’ll wait until I can buy it second hand for cheap!
You give me cheap, I’ll give right back to you – snap, snap and I’m out!
Soory Michael, this ain’t going to work for your girl, Janet.
Yes, the sudden yellow car is odd, especially in a video where all the colors are so muted. But my favorite is the wind machine in the nasty men’s urinal. Why can’t they make that a standard feature??
A lot of the questions and concerns are justified by the theme of the video, which is x-ray vision. It explains the boob-flashing, the car, the urinals, etc. Can’t we just all at least make room for the possibility that there’s a reason for all the things you don’t understand instead of writing them off as pointless?
I freakin love this video and song Janet is def. back. I was also bored by the 1st single but I truly can’t wait for her cd on the 26th.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i liked it, but i like everything
This song and video is HOT. Janet isnt “back”, she still here. She never left. If the superbowl never happend Damita Jo would have sold millions of copies. The video does have similarities to “All Night (dont stop), but only a select few people saw it. Only BET played it. Michael, please do a story on how MTV still wont play Janets video’s. Im sorry but Justin was on that same stage and his video is in heavy rotation. Also tell MTV to get over it. It was a breast and it happened like 3 years ago. I have seen more skin on MTV anyway.
It was like a video malfunction.
“iz ya, iz ya, iz ya hongray-ay-ay” for this video – NOPE!
Janet, sorry but this album is going NO WHERE!
Janet, Fire Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis. Their beats are as stale as that Cab Calloway cameo you tried back on Rhythm Nation.
Dear Janet,
It’s official, you only have you to blame for this… this… HOT MESS!
Don’t blame Jimmy Jam or Terry Lewis, who have crafted good music for you in the past (listening to “The Velvet Rope” right now) or your “boyfriend” Jermaine Dupri (who clearly doesn’t love you enough because he gave Mariah the good songs) or the director Joseph Kahn (who made the fab “Doesn’t Really Matter” vid for you).
This is your fault. Instead of looking back at your career (which is what I thought the point of “20 Y.O.” was supposed to be), you are trying to play catch up with all the young things. You don’t have to compete with Danity Kane. Let me say that again. You don’t have to compete with DANITY KANE! You are Janet Jackson! Learn it, live it, love it. I say this with love of course….
One of her worse videos ever. The whole sex kitten act is played out. You’re not 25 anymore Janet. Act your age! Yu can still be productive without the sex routine.
There’s a lot more Jermaine Dupri in this song than there is Jimmy Jam & Terry Lewis.
Chris Rock is right – today’s “R&B” is merely singing over rap beats. Let rap producers go back to producing rap. I’d like to hear melody and musicianship again, please.
I guess I’m alone again. This song and video make me wanna jump up and dance. Play this song loud as you’re driving down the freeway, and just TRY to not move to that beat. I swear, people on the roads here in Dallas must think I’m having a seizure behind the wheel, I’m jammin’ so hard!
can a person be so dumb!stay dressed and just sing and dance.
Your Janet commentary was spot on. Genius.
Michael will you go out with me?!
I cannot tell you how tired I am of Janet Jackson’s boobs! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! The Rollingstone cover oh so many years ago was kind of fresh and new and cool, but we got it Janet, you like your breasts! It is time to cover them up- oh and cleavage does not require that they be squashed together to the point that they are up to your neck. You’re sexy, got it, you love your body, good for you, now put them away and show us what you can do, if anything anymore. Sorry, I just had to put that out there into the world. I am now going to go to my happy place.
So, yeah, huge Janet fan here. Was not digging Call On Me. I tried to like it. I really did. Really. But, then I heard this and I love the song. Love it. Makes me want to move. As long as there are more songs like this on 20 Y.O. it’ll be awesome. Janet has always been sexual. So holding her boobs, is nothing new. The dancing is awesome. Love the video. Now if only MTV would play it, then I’d be even happier.
Boob flashing in videos is not common. Has anyone seen Gloria Estefan’s “Live for Loving You”? If you look very carefully, almost at the end of her video, she yanks off her bath towel and you see a slight view of her breasts.
I think that the problem with Janet and her breasts, is that no one cares. OOh! Boobs! Nipplegate ended, so can you close the book please. Great singer, and dancer but can you say that the toast is burnt?
It’s like you have a Big Brother webcam in my living room ficus, Slezak…otherwise how’d you know I’m still all over, “My Neck, My Back (Lick It)”?! And yes, of COURSE I know all the words (and I’d advise that if you decide to try to sassily pull off the “dirty version” at karaoke, it needs to be at the end of the night when you and your audience are bordering on blitzed. Trust…I red-faced MYSELF with the words that were comin’ out of my mouf! And that’s a feat, lemme tell ya.) Once again, eye-to-eye, you and me.
Seriously, how was Little Miss Sunshine?
And not to be catty Darrell, but step! I got here first! Ahem. Well, after Slezak’s husband…
Damn.
Jon…just to clear something up…Jermaine didn’t give Mariah anything.
The problem with Jermaine is that Mariah did such a good job crafting her own songs with him off on the sidelines, people actually thought it was Jermaine that was responsible for Mariah’s comeback. When clearly, it wasn’t. It was Mariah.
Such is the problem with Janet. Where Mariah has a clear and awesomely intelligent head for music, Janet does not. And neither does Jermaine for that matter. The success of the “Emancipation of Mimi” led people at Virgin (Janet’s label, and the ones who OUSTED Mariah) to think that Jermaine knew what he was doing and could do it again with Janet. But it was never Jermaine that created Mariah’s success. Mariah’s good success with Jermaine (as far back as their first collabo in 1996 with “Always Be My Baby”) is consistent. But if you look at Jermaine’s track record with non-Mariah collabos, the success ratio is iffy at best. Definitely hit or miss, and more of the latter, belive you me. I use this as evidence to state that Mariah is clear on how to manipulate his ideas into her own and make good songs people like, as well as to further reiterate that Janet does not possess this ability.
Which brings me to why Janet’s formula, which really hasn’t changed much, doesn’t work in today’s music world. The music isn’t about sex anymore. Sexually charged agendas in music died a few years ago. Pretty much as Janet’s successful “All For You” album exited the charts. Even if you look at Beyonce, today’s symbol of hotness, her songs aren’t about sex. While they certainly are sexy, they are more about the heavy beats and fast paced riffs that make them NOT like Janet’s where the beats are stale and the songs are just geriatrically about sex. Which just goes to show the changing and, dare I say, maturing tastes of the American consumer. Nowadays, it’s really about substance. This is why – while I it would been successful in the late 1990s – you don’t see Paris Hilton’s album selling like crazy, or Madonna, or anyone considered to be an authority on, uh, PUBLIC, human sexual behavior. Sadly, his includes Janet. And Jermaine Dupri was never strong enough on his own away from Mariah (who probably would have been successful away from him to begin with) to duplicate anything with Janet.
Solution: Janet needs to open a conversation line with Beyonce’s people. Janet can and will come back. Just not with this album and not with her boyfriend at the helm.
Ellipsian:
Sigh…
I guess I have a better shot at my cute neighbor in my apt building even though I don’t know his name or which apt he’s in.
(Sighs), some of you people just should keep your comments to yourself. I don’t understand all of the backlash…Who cares about the SUPERBOWL…that is such old news people…I think that this video is one of Janet’s best…the dance moves are hot…and at 40 Janet looks stunning. If you got it flaunt it!!! Janet is doing what she does best and it is working in this video. I was worried a little with the release of her first single (which is number 1 on the R&B Charts on Billboard) but with this song Janet is showing that she still has it. Janet can not please everyone because I believe just months ago everyone was complaining about her weight gain and now people are hating. She can not win for losing….so at the end of the day, Janet has to make herself happy first and whatever everyone else thinks or has to say does not really matter. Janet true fans will stand behind her. If you listen to the words of the song maybe you would better understand the video. People will always have something to say but at the end of the day Janet’s album will be number one………stop hating folks…it is just a video…LOL
no but seriously, why can’t janet talk about anything but sex and how much she likes it? In a 20 year old career Janet has never showed any type of personality or personal growth, instead her lyrics are now just parodies of herself. While Janet thinks she is empowering women, she is clearly just objectifying them further. Whatever she once had is long gone.
lazy as hell.
Damn, another snoozefest??!
Sigh.. I actually had higher hopes for this album; two bad singles back to back.. not good.
Janet is doing exactly what her brother Michael is doing with his music – recycling. How many times did we see Michael Jackson moon walk even when the current generation didn’t know what that was. Remember when Michael Jackson went on stage with N’sync and he started moon walking with his beer belly hanging out! It’s so sad it’s funny.
Janet’s doing the same thing, the Jackson’s can’t let go of the material that made them good in the first place.
Janet, she’s been doing routine after routine on her video’s. Ever since Paula entered her life she can’t let the dance sequence go. Next, she took of her top in 93, made the cover of Rolling Stone and hasn’t kept her clothes on since. C’mon Janet, move forward, your material is dated.
I can’t wait for this album to come out, it’s going to flop!
OK so this is supposed to sound or recall “control” yet two singles in a row and instead of control nostalgia we get more pathetic “Damita Jo” b-sides and both videos suck. this one sucks ’cause it screams desperations what with the needless nudity. naked, dress like a bad pirate-clown-queen, she just doesn’t get it. it is sad ’cause i like her and want her to do good but is like that kid who just won’t listen anymore and makes a fool of herself.