Apr 19 2006 01:13 AM ET

Baby TomKat and Baby Shields: What are the odds?

9526__bs_lWho’d have predicted same-day births for the daughters of Tom Cruise and his summer 2005 antagonist Brooke Shields (pictured)? That’s the kind of coincidence that makes Vegas oddsmakers guzzle Mylanta like it was Poland Spring water. But the bookmakers we know have responded quickly to Tuesday’s special deliveries and revealed the betting stats for several potential milestones in the lives of little Suri (Cruise and Katie Holmes’ newborn) and little Grier (Shields and Chris Henchy’s baby). It’s never too early to get in on the action.

Odds that Grier will inspire Shields to write a book, like the birth of older sibling Rowan did: 5 to 1
Odds that Suri’s mom had an epidural: 200 to 1
Odds that Grier’s mom will embark on a regimen of psychotherapy and prescriptions to combat postpartum depression: 5 to 2
Odds that Suri’s mom will do the same: 500,000 to 1
Odds that Grier will star in Mom’s next TV movie of the week: 12 to 1
Odds that Suri will appear in Mission: Impossible IV: 10 to 1
Odds that both Grier and Suri will be teased on the playground over their names: 1 to 2
Odds that Grier will be mortified when she comes across old ads of her mom letting nothing come between herself and her Calvins: 3 to 2
Odds that Suri will be mortified when she comes across footage of her dad dancing to Bob Seger in his tighty-whities in Risky Business: 2 to 1
Odds that Grier and Suri will have a playdate or a slumber party five years from now: 2,000 to 1
Odds that Grier and Suri would be born on the same day: 1,000,000,000,000 to 1
Odds of same, adjusted for karma: Even

Comments (1-30) of 68 Add your comment

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  • Michael B.

    That is great. Lol. You just made my day.

  • The Other Kyle

    I believe I brought this to attention in the previous PopWatch news item comments.
    You’re welcome EW.

  • Martin

    Just think of all the money both couples will save on joint b-day parties. Grier + Suri = BFF!

  • anna

    love Suri!

  • Don

    What if in 20 years Brooke Shield’s baby and the Tomkitten had this cool, Matrix-esque flying kung-fu fight for our souls?
    That’d be so cool.

  • Aramis

    Oh….drats! What, no stake through the heart to bring baby Suri into the world?
    I mean, how is a seemingly human baby to survive with two vampires for parents?
    I guess I can’t be so judgemental. I’m sorry. It was wrong of me…after all, Heather did have two mommies. I should be more accepting of the abnormal (the hellspawn of TomKat, that is).

  • Christine

    I hope Tom has to deal with some postpartum depression from Katie–he deserves it after all his nasty comments–he clearly knows nothing about it.

  • Sara

    Yes, Christine! Let’s all wish post-partum depression and other mental illnesses on a 27-year-old actress, just because her choice of mate is one who’s totally insane! Why wish bad things on the person who’s the actual problem (him), when we can wish them on a new mother who just undergone a silent birth with a pacifier and no epidural! BRILLIANT!
    Leave her alone.

  • pn

    Forget Paris and Nicole…….It’s now Suri and Grier, “The Suril life 7″, classic makings for hit reality show (half of profits go to the church of scientology).

  • sally

    WOOOOO! WOOOOOO! TOM CRUISE, PULL OVER, THIS IS THE IRONY POLICE.
    But officer, I wasn’t doing anything ironic!
    Son, do you have any idea how ironic you were going back there? First you spout off about post-partum depression, then you and your little lady here pop out a hatchling the same day as Brooke Shields.
    That’s not that ironic!
    Now boy, I wasn’t born yesterday, unlike your extremely ironic young’un. Please step out of the delivery room and place your hands on Ryan Seacrest’s behind. Hey now, no sudden moves. And please put on your pants. We don’t take no truck with tighty-whiteys in this town.

  • Amy

    Yes, Sara!! Let’s be a twit and bash other people for giving their opinions!!
    I hope Katie has postpartum, too, and see how Tom handles that!!

  • Caroline

    Tom is a freak and Katie is in a coma. How nasty do you think the custody battle will be when she wakes up?

  • Coastal

    Interesting how you never see Nicole with those adopted kids anymore…Poor Katie, good thing your father is an attorney!!

  • Christine

    Hey, Sara, I’ve HAD postpartum depression, with two children. I’m just saying that Tom knows nothing about it, since his first two children were adopted, and I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Katie got it, because stress certainly has something to do with it. Many more women get it than actually admit it. Tom can’t control Katie’s hormones with his mind, so if she does get it, it will be interesting to see if Tom admits he was wrong about it, but I doubt it. (Thanks for your support, Amy.)

  • dma69

    This is TOO funny. What are the odds of two warring actors having babies the exact same day? Genius! Sheer genius!

  • Christine

    In other words, it’s not that I really wish for Katie to have PPD as much as I wish for Tom to have to deal with it.

  • Delon

    Is it true that Tom wants to eat the baby’s placenta?!?!

  • e

    Will the truth ever come out that Katie was empregnated by a turkey baster? Also, when will Tom come out?

  • Howard

    Odds that Grier has an entourage in play group: 2-1 (Don’t forget, her husband is co-creator of that series).
    Odds that Suri will need the therapy that she won’t be able to get: 3-2.
    Odds that Katie abandons Scientology after a bout of PPD: 4-1.
    Odds that Tom goes along with her: 20-1.
    As I’ve usually told my friends, Cruise should have kept his mouth shut about post-partum until he got either a medical degree or a uterus. I hope that Katie doesn’t have to deal with it, but if she does, I doubt that we’ll hear about it unless she is able to handle it via Scientology’s methods. Still, the fact that the TomKitten and Brooke’s baby have the same birthday cracks me up.

  • Chris B.

    Rumor on Chicago radio is, not only did the mommies give birth on the same day, but at the same place, and even on the same floor! That would just be TOO much, if true! Can you see Brooke’s hubbie running into Tom in the hallway?!

  • coastal

    I saw a portion of Cruise’s interview with Diane Sawyer where he claims that he’s “close” to Katie’s dad and whole family. First of all, the look on his face while answering said to me “DAMAGE CONTROL”! Not an ounce of truth or sincerity. Also, how could Katie’s family be close to this guy when he won’t baptize the child in HER faith? I’ll bet they are LIVID.

  • Lu

    Suri? I wonder if there’s any fringe on top. Who know they were such musical theater fans.

  • Allison

    Suri Cruise? Isn’t that a city in upstate New York?

  • Fatima

    Oh, Grier can avoid being teased for her name if she claims she was named after the totally bad-ass Pam Grier. Of course, she’d probably have to tell those kids who that exactly is.

  • luv_my_junk

    this is freakin hilarious!!! THE IRONY POLICE-What a hoot!! Definately made my day!! I came over from Popsugar-totally worth the jump!!!

  • Mike Kennedy

    Please please please please and please go to this website…
    http://www.surinetwork.org/
    I love that they named their baby Suri especially after seeing this website. Man I hate Tom Cruise.

  • MonicaNichole03

    This is the best publicity stunt ever!! Go Tom!

  • sally

    Hey Mike–show some sensitivity! Little Suri can’t help it if she was born with unusually long eyelashes and an thick, luxurious coat.

  • Lu

    You know, the name Brooke gave her daughter is very common here in the deep South. We, though, spell it “Greer” instead of “Grier.” Maybe they have a thing for Rosie.

  • CEB

    Clearly, Tom and Katie did NOT go to that web site before naming their child, Mike.
    Seeing as this would be Tommy’s third marriage, and that he’s turned into a complete Scientology nut (I can’t believe Katie converted) IF they actually make it to the altar, I don’t think they’ll make it past five years. And Katie will dump Scientology. And Tom will be pissed…

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